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Recommended Reading For Separated Dads

By: Clare Birtles - Updated: 29 Apr 2017 | comments*Discuss
 
Divorce Custody Rights Children Books

From time to time we are asked for details of books and publications related to Separated Dads. Below is some information about books that our website visitors, fanpage members and legal team recommend.

Helping Children Cope with Divorce 2001
by Edward Tayber


Helping Children Cope with Divorce has been named One of the 10 Best Parenting Books of the Year by Child Magazine. This revised edition helps you minimise stress during your initial break-up and ultimate separation, explain divorce to children so they don't blame themselves, protect children from parental hostilities and navigate conflicts of loyalty and alliance.

Truth About Children and Divorce: Dealing with the Emotions So You and Your Children Can Thrive
by Robert.E.Emery


The Truth About Children and Divorce presents compassionate guidelines for divorcing parents on how to manage a divorce and its aftermath while promoting child resiliency and wellbeing, discussing such topics as the benefits of constructive fighting, handling the legal side of a divorce appropriately, and therapeutic parenting.

Hershman and McFarlane Children Act Handbook 2010/2011
by The Hon Mr Justice McFarlane


Published annually, Hershman & McFarlane Children Act Handbook provides a single volume source of key children proceedings legislation and related guidance. It contains consolidated, fully amended and annotated texts of the Children Act 1989. This book meets the need for a reliable, up-to-date and yet still portable source and will be used in court by all child law practitioners, judges and social workers.

Applications Under Schedule 1 of the Children Act 1989
Bazley J. QC et al.

Schedule 1 applications ensure that a child's financial needs are met, they can provide three forms of financial relief for a child, namely: a maintenance order, settlement, or transfer of property order against either or both parents a periodical payments order or lump sum order in favour of a child who has reached 18 and is undergoing education/training variation of an existing maintenance agreement containing financial arrangements This new publication is a practical guide to the practice, law and procedure in respect of Schedule 1 applications and includes case summaries plus sample forms and orders.

Resolution Family Law Handbook
Edited by Andrew Greensmith

Authoritative and fully up-to-date, this new handbook provides invaluable coverage of best practice on every aspect of family law. Published in association with Resolution, the leading family lawyers' association, and edited by its National Chair, it is both comprehensive and practical. The contributors are all leading family lawyers and between them cover all the key aspects in detail from marriage and civil partnership through to children proceedings and inheritance claims. Designed to be user-friendly, the handbook offers a range of time-saving checklists, pro forma letters and a useful contacts section.

Separated Dads Chat Room & Forum

Check out the Separated Dads Forum... It's a great resource where you can ask for advice on topics including Child Access, Maintenance, CAFCASS, Fathers Rights, Court, Behaviour or simply to have a chat with other dads.

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Stu - Your Question:
My son and his partner have a 9 month old son. The mother has dual nationality Australian (born in Tasmania) and UK. He is UK by birth. The mother for reasons unknown got an Australian citizenship and passport I addition to UK shortly after birth and has in fact been to OZ for a month recently on a visit. They have decided (for now) to split. There is an underlying feeling that she may intend to take my grandson to Australia to her parents. Will my son have any rights to objecting to this. He is named on the UK passport and I believe on the Australian as well as on birth certificate.

Our Response:
If your son has parental responsibility, the mother would have to ask for your son's consent to take his child out of the country. If he refuses, by law she would have to apply to court. If he feels she may refuse to bring his son back, then he would have to apply for a Prohibited Steps Order. A PSO is an order granted by the court in family cases which prevents either parent from carrying out certain events or making specific trips with their children without the express permission of the other parent. This is more common in cases where there is suspicion that one parent may leave the country with their children and not return. It can then become extremely difficult for the other parent to get their child back. Thankfully, this is one of the scenarios that a PSO seeks to prevent. However, as in all cases, the court’s main concern is the welfare of the child in question. The court will always put the child’s best interests first and this main issue will determine the outcome of any application for an order. I hope this helps answer your question.
SeparatedDads - 3-May-17 @ 2:07 PM
My son and his partner have a 9 month old son.The mother has dual nationality Australian (born in Tasmania) and UK.He is UK by birth.The mother for reasons unknown got an Australian citizenship and passport I addition to UK shortly after birth and has in fact been to OZ for a month recently on a visit.They have decided (for now) to split. There is an underlying feeling that she may intend to take my grandson to Australia to her parents.Will my son have any rights to objecting to this.He is named on the UK passport and I believe on the Australian as well as on birth certificate.
Stu - 29-Apr-17 @ 3:30 PM
grandparent - Your Question:
Hi my son recently split from his partner he has two small children with her.they split because he found out the her younger brother who was 13yrs old at the time now 15 rape two small boys her brother was found guilty put on tag and done a mental assesment and never went to any young offenders before social sevices was involed his mum move to by a camp site he is able to be around my grandchilren unsupervised no plans are put in order we call social services and told them but asked them not to go until we got the kids this friday just gone and they went out before we got the children.now my sons ex is telling him he cannot see his kids and when they were together she was violent towards him my son has an appiontment with a solitcitors on teusday morning just after more advice thanks

Our Response:
Your son's only recourse is to follow the procedure laid out in the article; When Your Ex-Partner Denies You Accesshere. If your son cannot afford the legal fees to take the matter to court, he can self litigate, please see link here. He may also be able to get a reduction in court fees if he is on a low income.
SeparatedDads - 24-Apr-17 @ 10:29 AM
hi my son recently split from his partner he has two small children with her.they split because he found out the her younger brother who was 13yrs old at the time now 15 rape two small boys her brother was found guilty put on tag and done a mental assesment and never went to any young offenders before social sevices was involed his mum move to by a camp site he is able to be around my grandchilren unsupervised no plans are put in order we call social services and told them but asked them not to go until we got the kids this friday just gone and they went out before we got the children .now my sons ex is telling him he cannot see his kids and when they were together she was violent towards him my son has an appiontment with a solitcitors on teusday morningjust after more advice thanks
grandparent - 23-Apr-17 @ 11:18 AM
i own 51% of a property on son owns 49% of the property they are going through a messy divioce she has a court ban on him can i rent out this property even if she is living in there
santa - 4-Jun-16 @ 12:15 PM
Hi, am on license after being sentenced to 18 months for ABH on my wife. Prior to this I had never any record of any crime. Now I have Domestic Violence record . I had been arrested numerous times because of accusations and allegations made by my estranged wife since I left the family home. My license conditions say I can see my kids via a third party who is my ex's mum. I have had family solicitors which I paid for to see my kids as they are always used as bait. Nowher mum doesn't want to be the third party. What is the best way to see my children? Probation won't help, social services aren't involved as they can see the strong bond I have with my daughters. Even if it is at a contact Center, I don't mind. My ex and kids came to visit me a few times whilst I was in prison. I called them everyday for 8months on the landline, now I can't when I'm outside incase my ex picks the phone up. There seems to be something wrong with the justice system as they can't see that some women almost certainly use the children as collateral damage when a relationship falls apart. I have spent thousands paying solicitors and it all seems that there is only concern for revenue and not the children. I have been married to my wife for 10 years, no previous issues until she started calling the police when I decided to leave. The whole system only favours women, many times I have proved my case and nothing becomes of the false accuser. Our children are suffering as a result of blatant disregard by the system to see that fathers want the best for their kids. Many many people I met in prison without previous issues, seemed to all have been convicted as domestic abusers. It was interesting to see that I was offered a discount to plead guilty. I have always maintained a not guilty plea and they threw the book at me. Domestic violence cases have a 95 percent conviction rate. More than any crime in the country. And it's all men that get sent down. Please could someone advise me what steps I should take to see my kids. I think I need a court order as my ex like many on these forums seems to not stick to anything, and Solictors claim to help but when emails aren't answered by my ex, they can't help even when agreements have been made . Everytimewhatever agreement in place gets ignored by ex's. Not much happens to the mums, only the dad's and their children suffer. I had to pay privately for family solicitors, for over 3 years to see my kids. My ex got a free solicitor and support. I up for every hug and lost everything. Come out of prison Because I was sent there "in the interest of the public" Rubbish system, only there to destroy and not build families. You only get legal aid if you are arrested. No other aid after that. All money is preferably spent on imprisoning, when you are out you are in the same spot, The Law must become tougher on women who make false allegations in court. Children should be given priorit
jan Paul - 26-Mar-16 @ 9:28 PM
Hi there, I recently got some advice from yourselves about my situation, since the last time I asked for advice I've decided I might just have to go down the route of court action to get my name put on my daughters birth certificate, what I would like to know is how long roughly does an action like this take to get put through the courts,I'll give you a quick recap so you remember the sircumstaces ,I've just split up with the mother of my daughter,I've a daughter 3 months old,my name wasn't put on her birth certificate when she was registered, she was registered with my surname though and I do see her 2/3 times a week,my daughter stays with her mum at her parents house, I stay on my own, like I said I see my daughter 2/3 times a week and I also pay towards her upkeep,so that's the jist off it,so like I said if I take it down the legal route to get my name on the birth certificate, how long does it roughly take
Paddy - 26-Feb-16 @ 5:54 PM
Darren - Your Question:
Hello. I hope you can help. I have a court order to speak to my 13 year old son every Sunday and to have him stay with me every other weekend and half the school holidays. However I have spoken to him only once in 6 weeks and have not been allowed to pick him up for our weekends or this half term holiday. Clearly a breach of the order. His step father and mother told me yesterday the reason is because of his behaviour and he has been sent to see a counselor who has advised them to stick to a routine that is comfortable for him. They have interpreted this as excluding me from his life. I tried to talk with him during my one and only phone call but he was being monitored and coached while speaking to me and I got the impression he felt under pressure to adhere to their wishes. I hope they have my sons best interests at heart but they are very controlling and refuse to accept my beliefs that it's best for him to have regular and frequent contact with both parents. Especially if he's having a rough time as is the case they told me about only yesterday when progress was made via a counselling session. I will write a letter to recommend that order be reinstated but if they reject my request which I think will be the case I will have to go back to court. And possibly represent myself as family law legal aid has been abolished. Any advice or help would be greatly appreciated. It took 30+ months to obtain this court order and am astonished his mother and step father can be so flippant to disregard it.

Our Response:
Please see link: Breach of Contact or Residence Order: What to Do here. Also, Legal Aid Withdrawal: How to Represent Yourself, here. Many fathers are having good results by self-litigation if they prepare their cases well. I hope this helps and you get to see your son soon.
SeparatedDads - 16-Feb-16 @ 3:00 PM
Hello. I hope you can help. I have a court order to speak to my 13 year old son every Sunday and to have him stay with me every other weekend and half the school holidays. However I have spoken to him only once in 6 weeks and have not been allowed to pick him up for our weekends or this half term holiday. Clearly a breach of the order. His step father and mother told me yesterday the reason is because of his behaviour and he has been sent to see a counselor who has advised them to stick to a routine that is comfortable for him. They have interpreted this as excluding me from his life. I tried to talk with him during my one and only phone call but he was being monitored and coached while speaking to me and I got the impression he felt under pressure to adhere to their wishes. I hope they have my sons best interests at heart but they are very controlling and refuse to accept my beliefs that it's best for him to have regular and frequent contact with both parents. Especially if he's having a rough time as is the case they told me about only yesterday when progress was made via a counselling session. I will write a letter to recommend that order be reinstated but if they reject my request which I think will be the case I will have to go back to court. And possibly represent myself as family law legal aid has been abolished. Any advice or help would be greatly appreciated. It took 30+ months to obtain this court order and am astonished his mother and step father can be so flippant to disregard it.
Darren - 13-Feb-16 @ 9:18 AM
Paddy - Your Question:
Thanks for your reply earlier. It has helped but it has also flagged up another couple of questions. Since I read your reply,you sent me to a link on parental responsibility, I'm unsure if I'm reading this correctly as I see its different for different parts off the UK and things have changed in the law it seems from year to year.what I was interested in finding out since reading up on this is.I'm from Scotland and my daughter it coming up for 3 months old and I'm still not on the birth certificate, If I get put on the birth certificate does this automatically give me equal parental responsibilities the same as my girlfriend or does the situation that I wasn't put on the birth certificate for the first 3 months make any impact on what responsibilities I'm given,thank you again for your earlier advice and from now on I will be making all payments I give her for my daughters upkeep through my bank account so its trackable, OK thanks again,look forward to your reply

Our Response:
You're welcome. PR doesn't give you many extra rights, or strengthen your claim for contact with your child - it only lets you make certain decisions regarding your child's upbringing. You could possibly try some of the sites listed on the Scottish government website here for extra advice. It is also advisable to read through as many Separated Dads web pages as you can, in order to understand the law better and so you can make informed decisions regarding what route you should take. Our Separated Dads Facebook page may also help.
SeparatedDads - 9-Feb-16 @ 1:44 PM
Thanks for your reply earlier. It has helped but it has also flagged up another couple of questions. Since I read your reply,you sent me to a link on parental responsibility, I'm unsure if I'm reading this correctly as I see its different for different parts off the UK and things have changed in the law it seems from year to year.what I was interested in finding out since reading up on this is.I'm from Scotland and my daughter it coming up for 3 months old and I'm still not on the birth certificate, If I get put on the birth certificate does this automatically give me equal parental responsibilities the same as my girlfriend or does the situation that I wasn't put on the birth certificate for the first 3 months make any impact on what responsibilities I'm given,thank you again for your earlier advice and from now on I will be making all payments I give her for my daughters upkeep through my bank account so its trackable, OK thanks again,look forward to your reply
Paddy - 8-Feb-16 @ 11:42 PM
Paddy - Your Question:
Hi there.I feel I'm stuck in a right nightmare rock and a hard place situation and I hope your able to give me some advice please. First thing first Im just a new first time dad and me and my partner which we are ment to be still seeing each other even though you or anyone else mostly wouldn't think so.myself I stay on my own and my girlfriend stays with her parents. My girlfriend which we'll call just to make it easier has already got a daughter to someone else and both of them are on their child's birth certificate but after they split up and me and her got together he started putting demands towards her which he's obviously and legally entitled to and as a result of his carry on it has put something kind of paranoia I can only explain it as towards me being on our child birth certificate as she must think if we were to split up then she wouldn't get all the sort of trouble from me that's she's been receiving from her ex.this has put a real strain on our relationship me not being on my daughters certificate,as much as I understand the way she must be thinking because of the bother she's had from her ex with rights about their daughter its starting to take a real toll on our relationship And I'm worried now were do I stand and what I can to get my name put on my daughter's birth certificate and to make I can see her.this is really cutting me up inside.I really do want this relationship to work and for us all go be a proper family but I'm starting to feel its not going to happen and I'm really worried about my name not being on my daughters birth certificate, what can I do if we do split up and I'm not o. The certificate.my daughter has my surname. I pay child support for her as obviously my girlfriend stays with her parents with my daughter, so I pay toward their up keep to stay there.I'm trying. I really truly am trying but I fell Im over the proverbial barrel and my heads bursting with it all.please tell me were I stand with things as they are and what I can do if the relationship does break down and we separate.how do I sort not being on this birth certificate. Thank you and sorry for it bei g such along message.just needed to let out a bit.thanks again.

Our Response:
I am sorry to hear this. If you can't agree between you, or through Mediation, then you would have to apply for Parental Responsibility through the courts, please see link here. If you are her father, and contribute to her welfare and play a part in your daughter's life, then you there is no reason why the court would not award it to you. I suggest until you decide to apply, you make sure your evidence is backed up i.e if any money given to your partner, ensure it is through your bank account rather than in cash etc so you can prove you have been paying child support.
SeparatedDads - 8-Feb-16 @ 2:55 PM
Hi there.I feel I'm stuck in a right nightmare rock and a hard place situation and i hope your able to give me some advice please. First thing first Im just a new first time dad and me and my partner which we are ment to be still seeing each other even though you or anyone else mostly wouldn't think so.myself I stay on my own and my girlfriend stays with her parents. My girlfriend which we'll call just to make it easier has already got a daughter to someone else and both of them are on their child's birth certificate but after they split up and me and her got together he started putting demands towards her which he's obviously and legally entitled to and as a result of his carry on it has put something kind of paranoia I can only explain it as towards me being on our child birth certificate as she must think if we were to split up then she wouldn't get all the sort of trouble from me that's she's been receiving from her ex.this has put a real strain on our relationship me not being on my daughters certificate,as much as I understand the way she must be thinking because of the bother she's had from her ex with rights about their daughter its starting to take a real toll on our relationship And I'm worried now were do I stand and what I can to get my name put on my daughter's birth certificate and to make i can see her.this is really cutting me up inside.I really do want this relationship to work and for us all go be a proper family but I'm starting to feel its not going to happen and I'm really worried about my name not being on my daughters birth certificate, what can I do if we do split up and I'm not o. The certificate.my daughter has my surname. I pay child support for her as obviously my girlfriend stays with her parents with my daughter, so I pay toward their up keep to stay there.I'm trying. I really truly am trying but I fell Im over the proverbial barrel and my heads bursting with it all.please tell me were I stand with things as they are and what I can do if the relationship does break down and we separate.how do I sort not being on this birth certificate. Thank you and sorry for it bei g such along message.just needed to let out a bit.thanks again.
Paddy - 8-Feb-16 @ 10:22 AM
I have been separated from my wife for approximately 3 years. We have a daughter who is now 8 years old. I have been claiming her since birth on my income taxes. My wife is receiving section 8 and food stamps throughout the marriage. I filed for divorce approximately a year and half ago, however she did not sign the papers. I always gave her a portion of my income taxes as well as approximately $400 monthly while I was working and even when I received unemployment benefits. She then decided to quit her job about three months ago, take me to court and signed my name to the divorce decree and told the judge that i have not been consistent with child support of which i don't have any proof. I moved out of state 1 year ago and purchased a new car and have put over 30, 000 miles on it (5 hours away) because I see my daughter often. I told the judge that she signed my name but she told him that we met and I signed. They did not address this issue at all. I don't mind paying child support but the judge ordered me to pay $179 twice a month and I only gross about $1600 monthly. I would like to request that the payments be a little lower, alternate claiming her on income tax and request that she start a education fund of about $25 monthly out of the money that she gets in child support payments
PD - 28-Dec-15 @ 2:46 PM
Snowy - Your Question:
Hello, I have PR for my 13yr old daughter as I was married to her mother at birth. We have been separated for 5 years and I remarried two years ago. I have not seen my daughter for 5 years as my ex has poisoned her against me. I tried mediation 4 years ago, but after the first meeting she had with my daughter, she said " those were not the words of a 9 year old child" and said she couldn't help. I have now started the mediation process again, but my ex is not co operating. I did get in touch with her school ( that my ex sent her to without telling me) and do get occasional reports. they did send me her recent school photo which was good of them. that is the first time I have seen her in five years. I have now found out that my ex is selling her house and may be moving some distance away. She obviously will not tell me anything, but can she just up and leave, taking my daughter, without any input from me re schools and doctors etc?I have read your article re letters to schools and doctors which I intend to complete. Would they tell me if she was being moved, and to which school / surgery?Many thanks

Our Response:
If you have parental responsibility, then if your ex is planning on moving away, you should be consulted to give your consent. However, this does not always happen and one parent may move away without the consent of the non-resident parent. If this happens it makes itmore difficult to bring the parent back via the courts, once their lives have become established, i.e through school places etc. If you have a suspicion you ex may leave the area, then one option is to apply for a Prohibited Steps Order. A PSO, is an order granted by the court in family cases which prevents either parent from carrying out certain events or making specific trips with their children without the express permission of the other parent. This is more common in cases where there is suspicion that one parent may leave the area with their children. We have all heard the stories of a parent taking their child for the weekend and not returning them or going abroad with them and it becoming extremely difficult for the other parent to get their child back. Thankfully, this is one of the scenarios that a PSO seeks to prevent. There is no guarantee that the courts will rule in your favour - it will be up to your ex to prove why it is in the best interests of your child to be moved from the area, and you to prove why is isn't. I hope this helps.
SeparatedDads - 6-Oct-15 @ 2:25 PM
Hello, I have PR for my 13yr old daughter as I was married to her mother at birth. We have been separated for 5 years and I remarried two years ago. I have not seen my daughter for 5 years as my ex has poisoned her against me. I tried mediation 4 years ago, but after the first meeting she had with my daughter, she said " those were not the words of a 9 year old child" and said she couldn't help. I have now started the mediation process again, but my ex is not co operating. I did get in touch with her school ( that my ex sent her to without telling me) and do get occasional reports. they did send me her recent school photo which was good of them. that is the first time I have seen her in five years. I have now found out that my ex is selling her house and may be moving some distance away. She obviously will not tell me anything, but can she just up and leave, taking my daughter, without any input from me re schools and doctors etc? I have read your article re letters to schools and doctors which I intend to complete. Would they tell me if she was being moved, and to which school / surgery? Many thanks
Snowy - 5-Oct-15 @ 6:51 PM
Bobbob - Your Question:
My ex is insisting that I pick our daughter up at 7:15 every morning during the school holidays. I've suggested it's better that she stays with me but she's being stubborn and saying that I should only have her on my usual days because of "routine". I understand routine is important but this is a one off. How can I make her see sense?

Our Response:
Is she asking for your daughter to be picked up for practical reasons, i.e, she doesn't want to leave her alone if she has to work? If so, then you can understand her motives. However, if she is being awkward and making life difficult, I can only really suggest you either continue trying to talk it through between you, or if you feel strongly about it, then both try mediation, see link: Mediation: What is it and is it For Me? here. I hope this helps.
SeparatedDads - 22-Sep-15 @ 11:30 AM
My ex is insisting that I pick our daughter up at 7:15 every morning during the school holidays. I've suggested it's better that she stays with me but she's being stubborn and saying that I should only have her on my usual days because of "routine". I understand routine is important but this is a one off. How can I make her see sense?
Bobbob - 21-Sep-15 @ 1:19 PM
My partner has just left the family home leaving me the father with our two children 7&9. She is about to start a new live with another man she has onlyknown for 5 weeks and they are about to move in together in rented accommodation. I have parental responsibility but am worried once she has got this new house that she will sweep the kids away from their home and keep them with her. Could someone please advise me as to my rights in this situation? We were not married? Many thanks.
Sam - 7-Sep-15 @ 11:45 PM
@layla - Your Question was:

Hi I have a cousin who's name is not on his sonsbirth certificate and his son's mother just stopped letting him see his son, now she's trying to move out of state. I'm trying to get as much information as possible to help him get custody due to the mothers cos&criminal background. any info would be very appreciative"


Our Answer is:
I have included a link to another of our articles, When Your Ex-Partner Denies You Access, link here which may help. If you take it to court, then he would have to apply for parental responsibility as well as access. However, it sounds as though you may be from the US, and we are a UK-based site, with knowledge of only UK family law, which means the information may not be applicable to you. Therefore, I suggest you seek some professional legal advice in line with your own country's laws. I hope this helps.

SeparatedDads - 6-Aug-15 @ 9:50 AM
hi I have a cousin who's name is not on his sonsbirth certificate and his son's mother just stopped letting him see his son, now she's trying to move out of state. I'm trying to get as much information as possible to help him get custody due to the mothers cos&criminal background. any info would be very appreciative
layla - 4-Aug-15 @ 11:40 AM
Hi. I ended a 4 and a half year relationship recently, because it just wasn't working anymore. We have a 3 year old little boy. In principal we agreed I could have him for a whole day during the week, as well as a few hours on a couple of other days, and overnight stays every other weekend. I also asked about turning my whole day during the week as an overnight as well, which she point blank refused. I'm getting lots of advice, people telling me to stick to my guns and go for more overnights. Is that wise? Am I asking too much? Stuart
Stupot - 28-Apr-15 @ 12:49 PM
@Gav - I'm sorry to hear this. You don't say why the protection order has been put in place or whether you have tried through the courts to gain access, so it is quite difficult to advise. I suggest you talk to someone directly in order to give them the full information, so they can give you more accurate and constructive advice. Family Lives offers offers a confidential and free helpline service via the link here. I hope this helps.
SeparatedDads - 10-Apr-15 @ 10:34 AM
I've been spilt from my wife for 5 months now and have only seen my daughter for a total of about four hours...when we separated I lost my job in the process alsomy drivers license and the house is on the market to be sold ...the stress alone to do with these and not finding work is bad enough let alone not being able to see my daughter..my x wife says she dosent trust me or my (our) friends anymore to let me see my little girl by myself or in a supervised situation with our friends...I know we are in the early stages of our divorce but the hurt from her sayn she don't trust me is making life very difficult to deal with...there is no history of violence..no one cheated she just called it quits via txt after 11 years of marriage because we no longer have the same wants in life ( her words)...I get that part of it but what I don't get is why now all of a sudden am I being treated so harshly and being told Im no longer trust worthy..she has taken all of my child's toys.pictures and paintings from my house and left me nothing ...those few things like the toys and that were the only things that would make me smile on the bad days..I can't contact her as of a protection order that's in place for 2 years now...I feel like a worthless piece of s#%t...i want to pick myself up off the floor and get on with my life but I'm finding it impossible to get anywhere due to the stress
Gav - 8-Apr-15 @ 4:10 AM
@Phil - if you wanted, you could apply for a Specific Issue Order through the courts. Specific Issue Orders, much like the name suggests, are orders sought from the family court to determine a particular matter in connection with the exercise of Parental Responsibility. These orders can cover a wide range of issues that you and your ex-partner cannot agree on including wanting to take her abroad, see link here . I hope this helps.
SeparatedDads - 20-Mar-15 @ 9:50 AM
My situation doesn't sound as bad as some I've just read and I feel for those people!! :-(! My ex partner won't let me take my daughter abroad. I can take her on holiday in this country and I have her overnight a couple times a week but she's not letting up on this abroad thing!! She's 5 and her mother says I'm not taking her until she's at least 11/12. I'm on the birth certificate with her mother!! I don't want my daughter missing out on these opportunities and I don't want to miss them when's she's at these wonderful early years!!
Phil - 17-Mar-15 @ 5:25 PM
@Jacks - he obviously can't pay all of this as it is physically impossible. If this is what his ex wants then he should go to the CSA/CMS and ask for a review, the CSA/CMS should set off any mortgage payments against the assessment.
Libby - 18-Feb-15 @ 10:55 AM
my partner currently pays approx. £500 per month to his ex for maintenance, their joint loan and credit card and school clubs, he also goes half on uniform and winter clothes. Now she says he also has to pay half the mortage which puts the total to 1200.00 a month, he earns 1248.oo per month> How do we pay our bills. HELP please
jacks - 16-Feb-15 @ 9:32 AM
hi been separated 6 yrs now ,had no contact with my 2 kids (told they dont want o see me ) she left me for a younger guy !! i lost everything house ,still not devorced .2 things recently happened my son unknown to me as left school do i still have to pay csa for him as not in education ,2nd i sent christmas cards to kids no money or vouchers enclosed 1st time hoping they contact me to say what they would like ,but instead cards came back with a note leave us alone ? WHY! Ive always tried to keep the peace and not upset the kids with court proceedings and arguments with ex ,What do i do HELP had enough now got to move on
falcon - 14-Dec-14 @ 10:15 AM
@Elaine - Yes, court judges have to take the view that children should have contact with both parents where it is in their best interests, whether it be under a supervisory order or not. Our partner page When Your Ex-Partner Denies You Access, should help you begin the process link here.
SeparatedDads - 9-Dec-14 @ 11:07 AM
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