Your Separated Father's Rights

I have 2 children living in England with their mother, they carry my surname even though we were not married, obviously we separated, I live and work in Austria and I'm French. The issue is that the mother doesn't want me to bring the children in Austria during their holidays. I would like to know what is my right as a father please?

Every father should look up the net for "parent alienation syndrome". I think 50% or more of divorced UK women with kids suffer from it. They use excuse that kids are consulted and no longer wish to see father of their own free will. In reality these women are mentally ill and deceitfully cunning. The UK laws and social work dept are ineffective in allowing this situation to go on without recourse to the mother. End result is destroyed love between kids and decent fathers who like me may never see my sons again.

I sympathise with all of the items listed on Fathers wanting and needing contact with their children and the mother - seemingly using them as pawns in a very messy battle, Imyself am a child who has grown up not knowing my biological father and I know it has had a profound affect on myself, Good on all the fathers who fight for their children - my current partner has 2 children with his ex and they have been moved way - he pays through the nose for them - leaving himself to cut back on basics not luxuries and never sees them & only hears from them when the mother wishes to effectively "play mind games" - this legal system of mothers having total control needs a massive over haul - its unfair on the children - I just wish both parents can see what they do to their own - Please if you love your children - allow them access with both parents for their own well being - unless there is a legal issue preventing contact - but surely a contact centre is still a useful place or a solicitors office etc - to maintain the contact.We did have contact with the children for small sporadic times - but them every single accusation came forward as to what we had supposed to have said or done which were all false. Come on Legal system update yourself to the twenty first century and the current climate.Children deserve better - lets give them the best life possible.

Hi. I am just wanting some advise regarding my 13 yr old daughter. My ex partner is planning on taking our daughter over 140 miles away, still in the u.k. but I am concerned about seeing my daughter. myself and my ex do not drive so it will mean my daughter catching a train every fortnight to ensure that I still see her as an arrangement. I feel that my ex will not be able to afford to send my daughter back and neither can I as I only work 16 hrs and a family of my own to support. My ex plans to leave in less than 2 months and I have only just found out. is there any thing I can do to ensure I still see my daughter. Thank you

Im currently trying to get pr , how do I get the arragreement do I have to arrange meeting for me and my ex partner.

If a mother has residency and father has contact order has he got the legal rite to keep her or have her placed with him by social services even though he has a history of violence and uncle is a convicted paedophile?

My partner has PR for his child, but has very rarely seen him for the last 15 years. Had absolutley no contact with the mother - her desicion. Shes made it incredibly awkward over the years, the child hasnt even been able to talk to him in the street if hes with mum.Anyway to cut a long story short, we heard from her last week that she was being prosecuted for him not going to school. She says she will try get him prosecuted aswell as he has PR etc. Everyday since then she has been in touch with mundane updates - (just to prove that she has been in touch, I'm sure a judge would realise what shes trying to do)But we really dont know what to do, give up parental rights or just wait and see what will happen?

Please help! My partners ex has started to make visits with his little girl difficult since we have had a baby. He has always paid voluntary maintenance and tries to have regular monthly and holiday visits. His ex is now making arrangements during our visits and says his 6 year old doesn't want to visit our house, grandparents or stay over night when we stay in hotels. Visits are becoming more difficult and expensive as we have to travel down there and book hotels. His name is not on the birth certificate. Does mean he has no parental responsibilities or rights? Can he use the fact he has paid maintenance as a negotiating tool to get some of agreement or contract?

Been through a lot over the past 5 years regarding my daughter. I married a foreign national, which turned out to be for a visa. I was one of those dupped. I seperated (my choice) from My EX when my daughter was only 6 months old. Been travelling from Glasgow to south Wales every fortnight to exercise contact, which I have never missed. Had half all holidays and fortnighlty contact, which was eventually granted in court order 2009. I have Been acused of allsorts, with sickening accusations, social reports, police etc. No one was interested in my side. After representing myself in court I had too get a solicitor for a final residencey hearing,costing way too much money, I had to give up my job to get legal aid. I didn't have the money to pay otherwise. what could I do? she had another relationship and had another baby, they have seperated now and the other farther is going throu the same as I did. I helped him in many ways as I didn't agree with the accusations, abuse etc that was put on me. we are now friends as my daughter has regular contact with his son ( her wee Brother - Half sibling). I moved to south wales to be closer to my daughter 2 years ago. finally I was threatened by her again,that she was moving so I would have to move again to excersise contact. Numerous signs wer indicatng to me that something wasnt right, my daughter who is will be 6 in April, was always upset and uncontrollible when going back to mother. Anyway I kept fighting and with social services involved, my daughter was placed on the child protection order along with her wee brother for reasons of neglect, To my disgust. I fought back to court again and again, to prevent her to move, which I eventually did, and fought again for a residence order in my favour. On 2nd of September 2011 I was granted shared residency, however, My daughter lives with me full time now,and sees her mother at weekends, when she can be bothered. I am the primary carer now, and the other father has his son in his custoy too. I have experience in representing myself in court and some knowledge of the children act and types of orders. If a can be of any help, please let me know and never give up, keep fighting.Fido

Hi - Very early days question - but I would value advice to be ready!Myself & wife in middle /late 50's and been married 31years - 2 kids 27&20.For past 10 years I have been working abroad - back in UK 4wks a year and joining for holidays abroad - she a teacher in UK. V. Good combined salary. I have passed all my overseas earnings through her account for investment. (House owned outright on shared ownership so no issue).Concern is that our substantial investments are in a mixture of Joint Accounts / her name ISA's etc. I have little knowledge, paperwork at home & do not have access priviledges - left that to her.Despite amicability, she says she is considering 'ending' our marriage (sepeartion or divorce?) - I away working - she says she is 'considering'. Question - while she is considering this future - could she clear / change accounts making them impossible to recover in any subsequent financial assessments? Thanks

Me and my ex partner have a 5 year old son together. We separated 2 years ago and our son has spent as much time with me as he has his father. Unfortunately due to my work commitments and shift hours I rely on my ex to care for our son when I'm working nights etc. up until recently all financial costs for our child were split equally between us. Now my ex has stated that he will no longer be contributing towards costs for my son, so day to day childminder fees which is used by both of us is now left for me to pay, and clothing and school materials! I have contacted CSA but they could only state that £11 per week was all I was entitled too due to our son living with both of us in separate homes 50% of the time. So my wueation is where can I get help or advice? I honestly don't want maintence or any payment to me all I ask is that any cost of our son is paid between us, why should I be paying all of the bills when I have my son just as much as his dad?!? Any advice appreciated.

I am a UK resident but an Indian citizen. I work and live in the UK on a Highly skilled Visa.My partner is German and lived in Germany (citizen).We were not married. We had a daughter 8 months ago. She (the daughter) was born in Germany and has a German passport with my surname. I am on her birth certificate as her father. My ex and I with our daughter continued to live in England after our daughters birth.We have recently split- amicably. But my ex has gone back to Germany and intends to live there long term.What can I do to get better access to my daughter. what are my rights and obligations in the situation? Please advise.

My partner is divorced, has one child and has already gone through the courts where he was granted visiting rights, the ex is now refusing him any contact with his child, including all phone calls, what can we do to get the visits and contact reinstated?

I live in Glasgow and split up from my wife 3 years ago due to an affair (hers!). We have two wonderful children from our marriage, children that I dote on. Up until a year ago I saw my kids for 3-4 days out of every 7, overnights, school runs etc., but then my ex made the work-related decision to move to Luton with her new partner and our kids. Access was arranged through lawyers, but my ex feels able to chop and change details like times, locations, even dates whenever she wants to. My finances aren't great, and it doesn't help that whenever I get to see the kids I'm the one doing 100% of the travelling to and from Luton, the cost of which prohibits me from being able to see them outside of arranged times. I am also the one keeping communication going; she won't allow the children to phone me from their landline as "it's too expensive". So I have to arrange most things through my 12 year old son as the ex won't talk to me directly. My lawyer seems unable to do much about any of this and I remain unconvinced her hands are tied by legality. If anyone out there has any advice, I'm listening and would be very grateful.

I have been having regular contact with my two daughters since my ex and I split. The contact was usually when my ex wanted me to have them and not when I wanted to spend time them. I went along with this as I was repeatedly told that if didn't take them when she wanted to go out or had no one else to watch them that I would no longer be able to have contact! In the end it didn't matter that I did what she wanted asI was informed by my children that they were moving in with their mums partner and was changing to the closest school to their new home(They were 5 and 6 when they told me). When I confronted my ex with what my daughters told me she replied in no uncertain terms that it had nothing to do with me that she was moving and that my contact contact was being reduced as I was no longer allowed them over night during the week because there school was a half hour drive away and didn't need me to take/pick them up any more. I work full-time so arranged with my work to be off at least one night every weekend to maximise the time I could spend with children but even this was not enough as in the end she has stopped all contact as she no longer needs me to be there when she wants. This means that my contact dwindled down from the majority of the week to suit her to one night a week to nothing as she lives next door to her partners parents! I am disappointed that any mother can stop contact when they want and get away with it. At the end of the day I love my kids and am fighting to see them but am bemused that it has taken me 7 months and a lot of money just to get to court to probablyget told that I can only get a couple of hours of supervised time with OUR kids just because she doesn't need me around

I split with my ex 7 years ago. I've been the for my daughter rain, sleet and snow. I pick her up from school every second weekend from school on the Friday and back to school on the Monday. All school holidays and loads of days here and there. I have an awesome relationship with my daughter that even my ex agrees with. In that 7 years, me and my daughter have went through thick and thin trying to rebuild our life together. I'm happy to say we have done well. I've met someone and both my partners kids and my daughter are living together. Two years now and going really well. On the otherhand my ex in that time still lives with her parents. She works all the time and has also moved on trying to build a life for herself but she never seem to involve my daughter. The result is that my daughter is spending more time with the grand parents. This seems to frustrate my daughter. She is 10 now and mature for her age and she is maybe now starting to realise that she wants to move over to me but I know this will be an issue. I'm glad she is sharing her feeling and can't betray her confidence. My question is are there any case studies similar to ours. My daughters mood when going to school on a Monday has always been subdued but now it's tears and not wanting to go in. Im starting to look at my options

I have a daughter who will be 13 in nov,i am an unmarried father who has had his daughter every weekend and for two weks away on holiday since she was 2.i have always paid maintinence for her,her mother has taken her 250miles away to live with a man and his son whom she says was an old school friend but met on face book a month ago.she still demands her money and I am left without my child,the only contact she has with us is with face book and an occasional text,her mother is now saying she will take us off face book as my mum tells my child she is missed and that she is loved by her family.can this be the law for unmarried fathers?we are devastated.we have since found out that she done a runner owing about £40000 in rent,community tax, credit cards and hp.she has let non of the creditors know where she is.she has also left with a very large wide screen tv and a washing machine she pays weekly for,and we are walking on egg shells not to upset her as she wont let us see the child again,what can be done.

With regards to Parental Responsibility, your website states the following: Unmarried Couples In general terms, an unmarried mother is deemed to have “parental responsibility” for her children. However, there are exceptions. You also have parental responsibility if: 1) The child’s birth was registered after December 1st, 2003 and your name is on the certificate as the father. 2) If the child was born before that time with no father listed on the birth certificate, but the birth was later re-registered with you named as the father. 3) If you and the child’s mother sign a Parental Responsibility Agreement. 4) If you’re given a parental responsibility order by the court, or a Residence Order for the child to live with you. I am separated from the mother of my two children. We were not married, but I was listed as the father of both children at the time the births were registered. My youngest child was born after 1st December 2003, so I assume I have Parental Responsibility by virtue of point 1) above. However, my eldest child was born before 1st December 2003, so my assumption, based on the points above, is that I don't have Parental Responsibility for them. However, my solicitor has since indicated that I do have PR as I am registered as the father on the birth certificate, but I can't see how my situation is covered by any of the scenarios above. In fact, what percentage of cases would option 2) realistically cover as opposed to those fathers who were actually named on the birth certificate before 1st December 2003 (like me)? Assuming the law was changed on or around December 2003, why does it not appear to grant PR retrospectively to those births registered before that date, only those registered going forward from that date? Is that just the luck of the draw or have I read it totally wrong and my solicitor's got it right?? I'm hoping the latter for a couple of reasons!£! Can anyone clarify this matter for me? Many thanks in advance

Hi, My partner has a 12 year old son who is due to visit us every other weekend and half of each school holidays, as per the contact order obtained last April due to mother's request. It happens that last month we moved to Devon (4.5hrs car journey away from mother's address) and she now claims that the son doesn't want to travel for so long for a weekend therefore won't allow him to b picked up. My partner understands that the distance can b an issue but, on the rare occasions he manages to speak with his son, the kid agrees in coming to see us.Despite the father addressing this with the mother she still refuses to let him come over. Furthermore, the child was supposed to come over for a 4/5 days holidays here, on school half term, as per the contact order, but the mother's solicitor has written to us to inform the child s not available has the mother booked 5 days holidays with him. My partner then proposed that the holidays could be booked either at the start or end of school holidays (which last 9 days) and both could have time with him as it is supposed to happen. The reply he got is that he is being unreasonable and the holidays have already been booked and paid for therefore couldn't be changed. Can the mother do this, even though she is going against the court order? Can he go back to court and ask for the contact order to be enforced so she will have to answer for all the times she has forbidden the child to visit us? also, although the kid says to the father he wants to see him the mother says he doesn't. We do believe the child is in a position where he wants to please both parts and says what he thinks each one wants to hear. can my partner request in court that a Cafcass guardian be appointed so the child has a saying in all this through an impartial person? Obviously my partner is very distressed with all this situation and doesn't want to upset his son but doesn't think it's fair what his ex wife is doing. In this situation what is the best course of action? I would appreciate if anyone could help as we can not afford a solicitor in this matter but he needs to do something to resolve the situation. Thank you for your help.

To all you caring daddys ! Well done ! Keep it up your children are worth fighting for !In my opinion courts are extremely biased,my partner looked after he's daughter for 2 years when her mum didn't want to know,she then decided that she fancied trying to be a mum, and my partner who had been her sole career with me as a help, had to have supervised visits ! Not the mum that hadn't been there ? How is that in the best interest of any child ? She then started court proceedings tried to take away he's parental rights, she didn't he got shared residancy, the courts gave her to her mum the majority of the time. Can you guess where she spends the majority of her time now.with her dad because her mum couldn't care about anyone but herself,we have her 5 days a week her mum 1 night one afternoon and her grandparents one night.if only those magistrates realised that not all mums behave like mums ! And some dads do a better job !

I've been seperated for the last two years, I'm in a very complicated situation. My x husband has my threee children, also he as a residency order, I've tried the last two years in seeing my children like going through courts, the last one was going to a contact order which I never heard from. I'm desprite to see my children and I really want them back is there anyway.

Hi guys I am missing my two boys a great deal haven't been allowed to see them in 9 years, my eldest is 14 today and all I want to do is hold them both and tell them I love them both. Their mother will not allow them to speak with me and I have tried over the past 9 years I really have, I am married and the boys have a sister who knows all about them. I currently pay £500 per month due to the CSA losing details, how do I get to see my sons if she won't let me I'm unsure about what is available to me as in help with finances do I go for a visitation order or something else? Please help me see my boys they need their father.

I separated from my ex partner a year ago after an acrimonious split (a restraining order was taken out for a year and I was charged with verbal battery) - in this time my ex has allowed me to see my son every week - I voluntarily pay maintenance and have never missed a payment - recently I have lost my job and have found it hard to gain new work and because of this I have had to sign on JSA, I will now have to contact the CSA and tell them I cannot afford to pay her, she has just come back from a holiday in Turkey and informs me that I cannot contact her and cannot see my son - I cannot believe she would do this and I think there is another man involved, how do I get legal rights to see my six year old son so that my ex partner cannot chop and change at will the access rights I have to my son. I also feel my ex is trying to get me to have a confrontation as the court order is about to end. My ex and her sister and husband where involved in causing a confrontation in the first place - I just want to see my son! Help me please.

My partner was cheating on me, we split in feb, every thing was going fine I was having my boy (2) every other week and more if she wanted me to. Then one time I say I can't have him and she accusses me of a crime which I didn't do. I was arrested and put on bail. The police dropped all charges as no evidence against me, but I have not seen my son for 3 months. She is now saying I've got to see him in a contact centre, but none of my family can see him. All I want is to see my son, how can she be so evil she cheated on me but im being treated as the crimanal not the victim.

I am a single mother - have been before my son was born. I have been having many issues with the father over the last 2 year (inbetween the period where we just hear nothing from his for several months). I have never denied access and will continue to be a amicable as possible for the sake of my son as that is the right thing to do. The reason I am putting a comment on this site is I have found it to be one of the most helpful sites to refer to. Even though it is aimed at supporting fathers, it has helped me understand that I am doing the right things in my approach to the father of my son. Other sites are very confrontational and aggresive, this site not only lists the rights of father but also takes into account the emotional needs of the children and even the mothers.Very helpful and I will even forward links onto my solicitor.

I am the non resident Loyal father of two children one is 16 and the other 11. Am divorced nearly a year and have mutually agreed contact two nights per week for both children which has worked and been an established routine for them. Maintenance is paid by me at the relevant CSA rate and has been since my X and I seperated although its not paid through the CSA - I pay it directly to her. She has suddenly last Saturday, moved to the other side of the country to live with the children and possibly new partner. She did not consult with me and forbade the children to say anything. She no doubt will be breaking our agreed and approved contact arrangements with the court because of the distance. Will I be forced to pay MORE child maintenance and have LESS precious CONTACT with my children if she directs the CSA to manage the case ? How can I get justice as their loving father?

My partner and I have split up we have a daughter who is 20 months. I have always had contact and had her overnight, she is now not letting me have her can she do this? I have been to a solicitor how long will it take before I get the right to see her?

I am separated now for 3 years but not divorced my daughter who is 16 and I see weekly lives with my ex partner, I have just spoke to my ex partner who has informed me she has been offered a job in australia and she is leaving england to move there in september she says she gave our daughter the choice to stay in england or go to australia with her she says she has chosen to go to australia please can you give me any advice on what rights I have.

I currently see my two daughters every monday and wednesday 15.30 - 18.30 every other week and have them for the weekend every three weeks.I feel that this is nowhere near enough time with them and I know that they would like to see me more too!I would like to have them every other weekend and for one evening every week 15.30-19.00!My ex Wife is making it difficult and I would like to know where I stand in terms of my rights for achieving this?thankyou.

I am currenlty having problems with my ex partner over seeing my daughter, i currenlty only see her every other weekend and i have requested that i see her on more occassions, however my ex partner will not allow this and i want to know what are my rights and how i go about gaining more access. She has also refused me a weeks holiday in the UK with my daughter which i also think is unfair and would like some advice on this also, i have read the internet but i dont seem to be any further on Thanks

i am a serving soldier living in germany, i have a son to my ex who lives in the uk, we were never married however my name is on his birth cert, as my son was born in Cyprus we had to go to Cyprit court and sign an afer david to get a cyprit birth cert with my name on it and then aply through the british embersy to get a british cert, i am now married to someone else and would like to bring my son to germany for the holidays. the ex says i can in the summer because it suits her( she is now with another soldier in germany) and she is visiting him then. i want to bring him over at easter but it dont suit her then so i have to take him to my mothers house. where do i stand leagly with this??? (i pay £390 a month CSA) oh and she wants me to pay for his new pass port