Changing Your Child's Surname

Changing Your Child's Surname

If you are separated or divorced, there may come a time when your ex-partner wishes to change your child’s surname. It is relatively common, however, for one of the parents, usually the father, to disagree with a name change.

Reasons for Changing Your Child’s Surname

It is usually the case that your child will carry your family name, particularly if you were married. After your divorce, your ex may wish to revert back to her maiden name and she may want to change your child’s surname to match her maiden name. Alternatively, Your Ex May Meet And Marry Someone Else, adopting her new husband’s surname. Again, she may wish to change your child’s surname to match her new family name.

Understanding the Procedure

The procedure for changing your child’s surname can be carried out using a family law solicitor. But the mother must get permission from you before she can do this.

Some divorces are relatively amicable and you may not be too concerned with a change to your child’s surname. However, many fathers wish for their family name to be carried on. In these circumstances, it is your legal right to refuse a name change.

Changing Your Child’s Name Without Permission

If you refuse a name change, the mother has no right to carry it out. If she was to change the name without your consent, you can appeal to the Court. The Court will take into consideration whether the name change is necessary and whether it would be detrimental to the child to change their surname, or in some cases to not change their surname. For example, if one child in a family unit had a different surname to the rest of the family, this may be considered as detrimental to the child.

Name Change Rights Checker

Find out your rights if your child's name is being changed. Takes 1 minute.

Try our Name Change Rights Checker free, here on this site →

If you want to change your child’s surname, you must also seek permission from the other parent. In the case of divorced couples who have lived together for some time, a Court is unlikely to allow a name change where one parent disagrees with such change.

Unmarried Couples

If you are unmarried and have separated from a partner, but have lived as a family for some time, a Court is likely to treat you in the same way as a married couple. If you disagree with a change in name, a Court would be likely to agree that it is in the best interests of your child to keep their current name.

This differs, however, if you have not been a family unit for very long, particularly where you are not registered on your child’s birth certificate (see our article on What Rights Do I Have If I'm Not On The Birth Certificate). In many cases, a Court will allow the mother to change the child’s surname, where it would be negative for the child to have a different surname. Again, this could be the case where a mother has remarried and had another child, all carrying the surname of her new husband.

A Court may rule that it would be in the best interest for your child to also carry the same surname, so that he or she feels part of the family unit. In these circumstances, the father is in a very weak position indeed.

If your ex-partner wishes to change your child’s surname, you should talk to them, tell them how you feel, and discuss why they feel that changing the surname is the best idea. Make it clear that you do not want the name change. If this does not work, seek advice from a solicitor specialising in family law.

For more information on your rights, read our article on Separation Rights For Fathers on this site.

The Next Step

Now that you have read through the advice above, you might want to put it into practice. Our Name Change Rights Checker lets you find out your rights if your child's name is being changed. Takes 1 minute. Try it now →

Ask a Question or Comment
C w laurie 21 Oct 2022
@caris,look I no sum small minded people will say stuff because I don't want contact with her daughter. But everyone has the right to there opinion.in my heart and soul im perfectly fine with it and at the end off the day thats all that matters .(why should I be punished for a mistake I made as a 22 years old kid??.)her mother fell pregnant to (trap me) because her( husband committed suicide )and she was a single mum so she manipulated me because off my tender years its that simple. She was older enough to be my mother at the time.ugly old hag now I bet .
C w laurie 21 Oct 2022
@caris,yeah I dont want to bother with this child that is correct I will take that .but I dont see it as neglect in any form .the child in question and myself dont even know each other so how the hell can that be neglect.( That's just her stupid mother carrying on like pork chop like usual) .that women just can't get though her head that I just don't find her attractive .I was always repulsed bye her just her whole demeanour and everything she stands for .I can't help it I look down on her .(when I was young I was embarrassed to go down the street with her) .she just wouldn't leave I tried everything to get rid off her. I spent most off my time back then at my mother's just to get away .then she would turn up there I would get my family to lie for me and say I wasn't there .that's how unhappy I was and I will never live that way again .life is short and if someone or something makes you unhappy it's just not worth it .everyone I think has to do what's right for them .even if other people don't like it .
Caris 20 Oct 2022
My daughters dad is on the birth certificate however I had to stop his contact with her just after her first birthday due to his neglect towards her and aggressive behaviour. He has a lot of mental health problems leading to anger issues so I asked him to try get help with hoping it would help with his angry and make him more patient with our daughter but he hasn’t done anything or bothered to contact me asking to see his daughter and it’s been 2 years he’s now having another baby with his girlfriend so it’s like he’s just replacing her.. it’s just me her and my mum in which me and my mum have the same surname and she has her dads but none of his family contact her they all walk past hee in the street ignoring her but He said he won’t let me win by giving me permission to change her name.. can I do anything?
C w laurie 4 Apr 2022
@Sophie, bingo (finally you worked out) that I want nothing to do with your daughter it took you( long enough) . and yes I'm 100 percent agreeable for the name change (do it )and yes go to the solicitors they will sort it out .
Sophie Hardy 3 Apr 2022
I have a four year old daughter that has her fathers surname, I want to change it to mine as he doesn’t bother with her or neither does his family. He agrees to the name change, do I just have to go to the solicitors with the paper work and then it’s all done?
Terry 9 Aug 2021
Hi i want to change me wifes 3 kids last name to mine and the father has not been in the kids lifes for years and the 3 kids want my last name can i do this ? And how please
Califo 21 Apr 2021
I would like to adpot my step daughter What can do
Sugar 26 Jan 2021
Hi we are on married and separated . My husband is demanding that our children has his surname. At the moment that children only has my surname and he wants his added on because he wants the children to be more closely to his family and get to know them better . I agreed to it to make life easier . What is the process and how much would it cost ? Do we have to go to court ? Will we be able to get a new long birth certificate with the new surname on it
Katy 7 Dec 2020
Reply to Mia. Hi Mia, I am also going through something similar. I have hired a solicitor and if you are in a financial position to do so then I recommend getting one too, just for advice at the very least. My solicitor wrote to my daughter's biological father to seek an amicable agreement which he refused, the next stage would be mediation which would probably be done via video call, if an agreement can not be made with a mediator then a Special Issue Order will need to be issued with the courts which you and the biological father would have to attend once a date is set. This also means the children would need to be interviewed by a CAFCAS officer alone, to hear their wishes and feelings on the matter. If you feel in your heart of hearts that you're doing the right thing by the children and respecting their wishes then I recommend proceeding until it doesn't feel right anymore. If the name change is refused then at least you know you did everything you could and if your children still feel the same when they are older then they can apply for the name change themselves (or wait until the children reach the age of 12 and then the courts take into account their feelings and wishes much more seriously) I hope this helped. Katy
Bamboo 6 Nov 2020
I’m at my wits end! We have a court hearing in December regarding the name change of two of my children and I’m scared it won’t happen! I have 3 children - one daughter and two sons. My daughter does not know her biological father, but believes my ex partner (my second sons father) is her daddy, so I am the only person who has parental responsibility of her. I have had a son with my new partner and we are getting married next year. Newest son has his fathers surname, however my other two children have always had my surname so I am attempting to change their surname from my maiden name to what my married name will be. Has anyone every experienced anything like this? I’m trying to change their names because it’s what they want and it means we will be a family unit and so that they will continue to share my surname, albeit my new one, once I get married? My ex partner is making life very difficult and for the first time in the 8 and 5 years since the children were born suddenly has a problem with them having a different surname from him - he has also stated he doesn’t want the name change to go ahead because he doesn’t want them having another mans surname - when the surname didn’t matter at all whenever it was my surname! Both children are dying to have their name changed and it’s breaking my heart that someone who is supposed to be an adult is breaking their hearts and trying to bribe them into day saying they want his surname and telling them they are bad when they disagree ??????? He doesn’t contribute to their upbringing at all - not financially or in anyway - they stay with him 1 night a week and that’s as far as his contributions go. I try and update him about the important or fun things going on in their lives and he is completely disinterested.
Tia 10 Oct 2020
Hi, I have son three months old. I never lived with his father but he was happy to baby has his last name. After he got his last name he changed a lot and he didn’t see a child now two weeks. I probably made mistake thinking it will be good to baby has a father and his last name, but... :(. What I can do and how to I change baby’s last name to be as mine?
Mia 11 Aug 2020
We're not married and we're not separated,but their family don't like me ,and in the first place that I have met my partners family,I don't feel that I'm a part of their family.when I and my partner have two sons ,they have my partners surname.but now I want to change the surname of my two sons with my surname..please someone advice here.
Chayo 27 Jul 2020
I have problem I have 3 kids same father they used therer father's surname now we separated ND we didn't get married the guy his from Zimbabwe he was using wrong surname in order to get the south frican I'd four years back the time the Zimbabwean sarender wrong pepars he also sarender and change also the surname to a real surname now my kids are left alone into a wrong surname so I want to change the surname into my surname what should I do coz we no longer together with him ND we didn't married. Please help
Tania 24 Jul 2020
We're not married and we already separated. He already have another family, is it possible to change my son's name to my maiden name? Thanks
Bex 9 Jul 2020
Hi my son is 5 and his dad last seen him 3year ago we lived together as a family for 2 months after he was born then he disappeared he is a heroin addict in and out of prison his family have also no interest in my son I dont know where he is living can I change my sons last name
C w laurie 27 Jun 2020
@mphumi.yeah there is a whole show on YouTube about bio fathers signing over pr From infants to teenagers I found it really interesting and relate so much to these bio fathers who just want to get on with own life’s sum had other children and where married and even those fathers sign away pr to child they had when very young because it was just a fling when young .and the mother had remarried so it was the best thing to do for everyone .(this is how adults should act and put child best interest at heart) .(i am 100 percent willing to do it I just don’t have any contact other wise it would of been done bye now if I had my way ).
C w laurie 27 Jun 2020
@mphumi.if a guy is willing to take on that women who two kids to different fathers now he has knocked up and (willing to be with her )he’s a (better men) then me .and to show that i think he’s a better men I would love to give him my pr over to him So he can adopt the teenager or carry he’s name so he can pay for her teach her drive you know all those fatherly things people do .i got this idea online and I wanted to do the same because it’s 2020 now and in fact it’s very common these days for bio fathers signing over pr I would love to jump on the band wagon.
C w laurie 27 Jun 2020
@mphumi.(i was never married)but i think personally if the mother was or is pregnant with a guy and is in a relationship with her .bye all means I think the mothers daughter should carry he’s surname it would make the guy happy and her daughter happy one big family unit seen those shows online it’s very common these days .(i have stated to the mother that I would happily sign over parental responsibility legally )because if am honest I couldn’t care less about her daughter even if she was raped mistreated abused bye mother and ex partners .i don’t care .like if it did happen like it’s (sad but in reality it happens everyday all the time to everyone that kind of stuff) .its just called life .got of topic but yeah I am 100 percent willing to sign over pr .been that long and childs age I don’t think I have pr if I do I don’t want it .
Mphumi 27 Jun 2020
Iam married bt now m in separation with my husband for years , iam now pregnant with onother man babby , is it possible to give my maiden name to my child?
C.laurie 24 May 2020
@martha.this is what I want (so bad )I want my surname (removed legally )form this child I wish her( stupid mother was like you ).(i am shamed to have a child to this women gods truth )and I swear on the holy bible I will never talk or have contact with her mother or her (stupid daughter) .and I agree with you 100 percent That in situations like ours it’s the (smartest move )to remove surname legally. Because I couldn’t give a flying f about them and will not be signing papers if papers where sent to my place I would in all honesty throw them in the bin .i can only hope she comes to her senses like you have and has a sound understanding that this is best for all.
Martha 24 May 2020
Hi I need some help what I have to do if I want change surname for my daughter because I'm broke up with her dad. I'm with my daughter back to my original country where I come from and her dad probably back to his country as well. He don't want to have contact with us anymore so I don't want shell have his surname becouse that can make trouble for us in the future.
Thembi 7 May 2020
Hi I have the same problem,I have two daughters and my first born is using my surname and my second born who is 9 years is using her father's surname we were not married,we broke up on 2015 and on 2016 I decided to live Capetown,so I moved to Pretoria with my kids now it's been five years,I have tried to go to Pretoria home affairs they refuse to help me change my child surname on 2018,they said I must get court order they can't help me,I really need advice I don't know what to do I'm getting married this year and my partner wants my kids to also take his surname when I'm his wife,he is been supporting them since we met,please help me
Prince 7 May 2020
Split up mid 2017 and my ex got me a non molestation order. She also got me a restraining order. I was very new to all this bs. After educating myself I went to family court where all her allegations where thrown out. Its was a gruelling hearing where social and police disclosures proved i was never in the wrong. Now its come to my attention the children are using mothers surnames. We are still in child hearing and all orders state "nobody should change children's surnames". Where do I go from hear. Do I rise this issue with the judge? Also it's been a year since contact was ordered and mother told she must encourage and bring the children for contact. She claims children are refusing..... even video contact
Girly girlx 30 Mar 2020
Hi I have got shared custody with paternal grandparents they have her 2 nights a week and I have her 5 I want to change my child’s surname to my surname I haven’t been with the dad since my baby’s been born she has his surname and I was wondering on people’s view how I can change it and if I would be aloud
Mel 12 Mar 2020
My child father has not been in his life since birth. My son is going on 5. My husband want to adopt my son so that we can change his surname but his father his refusing to consent eventhough he have stated over and over how he doesn’t want the child we had together. What can I do??
Christina 15 Dec 2019
Can my sons farher change my sons first name without my consent cuz my sons dad changed it by deep polt without my signature
C.laurie 24 Nov 2019
@jane68.now after I expressed my (hurt and anger and disappointment)I (realised) i don’t want any (contact) .if the child wants to change name first or last I have( zero feelings )about it .go for it it’s (her life) and if changing her name makes her happy do it .i been gone( 10 years )so the way I see it she doesn’t need (my consent gods truth )It’s up to her (mother and partner they are the ones with custody and the ones with parental responsibility )I am know one in reality to the child .
C.laurie 24 Nov 2019
@jane68.when you been hurt sometimes you don’t won’t to be (found )you just want to get on and move on with your own life .i know I was abusvie and( I don’t care) I got everything I wanted to say off (my chest) I even had to go to (court )for it .it was (worth it )because I feel much better now .now I couldn’t care less all the best to them .
Jane68 24 Nov 2019
Hi my 13 year old transgender son wants to change his first name for obvious reasons. We can’t get consent off his father as he was abusive towards me. His family and his friends basically disowned him, so he just left with no contact at all, not even a birthday card ect to his son. I’ve searched the internet, Facebook and all social media sites for his father and I’m at a loss. How do I change my sons first name without his fathers consent?
Jane68 24 Nov 2019
Hi my 13 year old son wants to change his first name. We can’t get consent off his father as he was abusive towards me. His sister and his friends basically disowned him, so he just left with no contact at all, not even a birthday card ect to his son. I’ve searched the internet, Facebook and all social media sites for his father in at a loss. How do I change my sons first name without his fathers consent?
Maria 18 Nov 2019
Hi my daughter is 7 years old and has her dad's last name I have a son who is in my surname has he has neva met his dad. Now my daughter keeps asking me if she can change her surname to mine and we all av my surname, she has not seen her father now for two year xmas day 2019 he never makes contact with her or doesn't see her can I change her surname if I want to thanks
Rubie 22 Oct 2019
Hi I just want to ask on how to change my 2 kids surname because they use the last name of their father but we are not married and we separate 5years ago. Now I have a boyfriend and we're planning to get married so we both agreed to change the kids surname and use his surname for the kids. What are the steps or process should we do for this to happen?
Rose 10 Oct 2019
My baby wrong surname because my aunty did
Maria 7 Oct 2019
Hi I have a similar question I need to know do I am able to change my son’s only first name the surname which I don’t have any issue I am separated since my son’s birth I don’t registered our Marriage. Please note it that first I registered my son’s name but his father challenged me and changed my son’s name without my knowledge which was very surprising for me after that I apply by deed poll but now I am stuck in the passport because they won’t except without father’s confirmation please give me good advice what is the best solution in this matter thanks.
Nurii 12 Sep 2019
I wasn't legally married in finding out about my pregnancy , after my baby girl been 3 months the father had left & has not been seen or contacted. She is a year now & i want to change to my maiden surname for the reason that he isn't coming back or that he isnt in our lives. How can i change it?
Monalissa 28 Jun 2019
I have a child for my boyfriend and the child is carry my surname can I change it to my boyfriend surname without marriage ,and my child is 2years old
Stace88 23 May 2019
Hi me n my 3 childrens dad spilt up 4 year ago, we are finally divorced and he has not had anything thing to do with my children for the past 2 years (his choice). I still go by my marital surname so I'm the same as my kids but me and my partner are due to have a baby in a few months I obviously can't put my ex's surname and I would like to go back to my maiden name but don't want my 3 children to be different, is there anything I can do?
Emiciak 4 Apr 2019
Hello I want change surname my kids because the father of the kids not interesting father disappeared I have no contact with him, no interest in the children does not help or pay
Chris 5 Mar 2019
I feel the same the( awkwardness off my situation and been aware sending stupid messages like idiot after all these years I even had to go back to court for sending messages years after the break up stupid idiot )and the( time frame) and my own personal life and been( unemployed )I have to make same changes to my life so I am a better position to see my daughter .instead writing in blogs that is not going to fix the situation or help my mental health .
Fedup123 5 Mar 2019
Hi help needed. My brother had a child with his ex, throughout the pregnancyshe was with someone else. When the child was born my brother wanted a Dna test but she kept refusing. 2 year later she decided to do 1 and came back the child is my brothers. He as contact with the child but the unfortunate thing is he's not on the birth certificate her current partner is (now husband) how does he go about changing her surname and getting his name on her birth certificate and also gaining parental rights. Please someone help
Jhen 25 Jan 2019
I am married and was separated by my husband for 7 years. I used his surnames in my records. Fortunately I got involved by another man and we begot a baby girl. However i cannot used my partners surename in my baby birth certificate since I still used my ex surnames in my records. What will i do?
Carzan82 24 Jan 2019
Do I lose any rights if my kids lose my surname? The ex wants the kids to have the same surname as her or a double barrel name with both of ours in it
Laurie 10 Jan 2019
@teardrop k .this is (what I want )because it’s the (right thing to do for her daughter )to officially erase the only tie left is my surname I know deep down she wants it to so would her daughter .i have never been court and (never will for rights never payed child support .as for the impact my her daughter and myself is (zero )because it’s been 10 years she wouldn’t even (remember me has i her )it makes things (easier) with the (official name change) for medical ,schooling ,passports ,family ,anything really .makes common sense to me and in our situation practical and the right thing to do .
Teardrop K 10 Jan 2019
Are there any negative aspects that can arise as a result of allowing my ex to remove my name from all official paperwork. My ex-partner is attempting to completely remove any evidence that there is a connection between me and my daughter at all, in effect erradicating me from my daughters life totally? I don't understand the full impact this can have on either my daughter or myself?
Solla 9 Jan 2019
I recently split from my wife (approx 5 months ago now). She has thrown at me a couple of times since then that when we are divorced she will be applying to have our 3 children's surnames changed to her maiden name. Her reasoning is that why should she have a different surname to her children and doesnt want them to have my "scummy" name The break up was my fault but i am desperate to reconcile but she is having none of it. Side note - I have registered to use the forum but im not getting the verification email? Any help would be appreciated
Lex 8 Jan 2019
Ive recently split with my partner after 9 years ,when our son was born i agreed verbally go have his mothers surname to keep it as the last son with that name ,we then had a daughtet where we hyphenated her surname ,can i do now request to this with my son
Ell123 10 Nov 2018
My daughter is nearly 2, her dad has seen her all of about 4 times during this time and refuses to pay maintanance anymore and due to a mutual dispute he doesn’t see her anymore. Do I need his permission to add my surname to the birth certificate as he’s very childish and wouldn’t agree to anything like this
SeparatedDads Editor 10 Sep 2018
The link here should help explain further. Unless you are registered on the birth certificate, unfortunately there is nothing you can do.
Brook1981 9 Sep 2018
Hello all , please help I have a problem , i had a baby with a woman out of marrige , i have paid money for the child every month since born but we do not talk . She always knows where i was and she had full contact with my mother from birth . Any way she has had a d-poll certifitcate that she has changed his name . I am on the birth certificate ? What has she done and can i do anything about this ? Thanks for any help on this I think she has done this woth out my permission . Has she beoken thw law ?
Jayne 25 Aug 2018
My friend's ex wife is pregnant by another man but now split up, she wants to use her married name to give to the baby so the baby has the same name as the mum even though her ex husband is not the dad. Can she do this?
peterkay 19 Aug 2018
Hello, me and my wife have a little argument and she presently has pregnant for me and she refuse not to put my surname on birth certificate of that child, please advice me what to do thanks
SeparatedDads Editor 17 Jul 2018
Your ex would have to request your permission again
BPC 16 Jul 2018
My daughter has her mothers surname now which i signed the deed poll.Now she is married can she change it to her husbands surname without my permission??? im on the berth certificate and still in contact
SeparatedDads Editor 6 Jul 2018
It seems that changing the child's surname isn't the issue here. I assume the issue is that you wish to disprove your paternity. In order to do this, you would have to take a DNA test, Until you do, you will be considered the child's father and liable to pay child maintenance for his day-to-day upkeep until the child leaves full-time education. Until you prove otherwise, as far as the authorities are concerned if you are registered on the birth certificate the child is biologically yours. Therefore, in order to prove the child is not yours you would have to refer the matter to the courts.
mike 5 Jul 2018
I met this single mom of two kids, and we have a relationship almost 3 months then I discovered that shes pregnant with her exboyfriend.. so that's make it 3 kids.. then I decide to adopt the unborn kid illegally without the consent of her ex.. then time passed by her true colors appeared.. now I know why her ex doesn't bother her anymore.. and I want out.. bad for me because we registered the 3rd kid to my surname.. is there any way I or we can change the kid's surname?
SeparatedDads Editor 18 Jun 2018
You can try. However, I'm not sure it will get you very far. Your child's mum is able to change your child's name 'unofficially' if she requests this via the school i.e she wishes your child to be known as the same name as her, or any other siblings your child may have. If your ex wants the name change permanently and you refuse, then your ex will have the option to take the matter to court. If she does, you can see what the process is here in more detail. As in all cases, the court’s main concern is the welfare of the child in question. The court will always put the child’s best interests first and this main issue will determine the outcome of any application for an order. Your option is to weigh up what you also think is in your child's best interests, as going to court will cost. If your ex wants to change your child's name because of family uniformity, then it is likely the court will allow this.
Domo 17 Jun 2018
Hi My daughter is starting infants school in September and my ex has already said that she is taking legal action as I haven't consented to changing her surname to her Mums surname. Can I prevent the school from using her Mums surname?
SeparatedDads Editor 15 Jun 2018
whichwill tell you all you need to know.
Sarah Perkins 15 Jun 2018
My oldest son would like his name changed to match the name of the rest of our family and my name as it is soon to be changed to through marriage. Me and his dad haven't been together since he was one and since i have had 4 more children with my fiance. He also stopped seeing his child just before he was 3 years old and cut off all contact with us and started his own families and he is now nearly 10. His name is on the birth certificate but I do not know of his whereabouts and have no contact with him. Would I be able to change my son's name without his permission?
SeparatedDads Editor 4 Jun 2018
If the father has parental responsibility, you still have to ask permission
Looby 2 Jun 2018
Hello, can anyone tell me where i’d Stand- my child is 1 1/2, and hasn’t had contact with his father in almost a year since he was arrested and cautioned for assaulting him. His father is on the birth certificate, but we were not married. He has his fathers surname, but I want to change it to mine. Under the circumstances, contacting my ex about this is not particularly simple. Does he still have the same parental rights in this case? Thanks.
chriso 25 May 2018
My daughter has my last name well she still going under it on facebook.Her mother was going to change it but i called her and sweet talked her i had to turned on the good old boy charm I turned it on full blast to save my rights To my daughter.because i didnt want to lose my rights.
Lee1971 25 May 2018
Hi I let my ex change my child's surname to her new married surname as part of a CSA agreement to which she has not followed her word.. is it possible to have a child's surname changed back once it's been changed
SeparatedDads Editor 1 May 2018
The mother of the child has the right to choose the surname she wishes to register the child under.
Raf 30 Apr 2018
Hi,wanna ask you what surname my child will have.As she is still married and have already two kids... My baby with her will be born in few months.Can you please help with that?Thank you
SeparatedDads Editor 27 Apr 2018
You would not be able to change your child's name by Deed Poll if the father is registered on the birth certificate. You would have to seek permission through the courts if you cannot contact your ex.
Ajay87 20 Apr 2018
Hi My daughters dad cut all contact via his wife nearly 18 months ago and hasn’t made contact since. She no longer wants to go by his name and I do not know where he is. Can I change her name via deed poll? Thanks
SeparatedDads Editor 20 Apr 2018
If you are not registered on the birth certificate as the father, then the resident parent can choose to change your child's name without having to ask for your consent.
taz123 19 Apr 2018
Can my daughter name be change if not on birth certificate
SeparatedDads Editor 16 Apr 2018
A child's legal name can easily be changed by Deed Poll providing everyone with parental responsibility (PR) for the child consents to the name change, please see more information via whichIf your ex doesn't consent, then as as the article explains you would have to apply to court. If you do not wish to take the matter to court, you can change your child's name unofficially by allowing him to go under a new name via your son's school and GP. However, his passport and other official documentation would remain under his original name until it was changed via Deedpoll.
Chazza 14 Apr 2018
Hi can someone help me please ? Can I change my son's name to my surname ? He is 4 year old he says his surname name same as mine. But on his birth certificate is his father's name. They have the same name he hasn't seen his father for 2 1/2 years. I have a court order he's not allowed near me cause of domestic violence. I have also signed child protection orders that he can't see the child incase he hurts him. So he decided to take me to court to see his son. I keep asking my solicitor can i change his surname but he's not very helpful. Thank you ??
SeparatedDads Editor 23 Mar 2018
If your partner has parental responsibility, then you would have to request his consent. You can see more via which
Craig 22 Mar 2018
I've recently split from my partner we have a son of 5 together who has my partners last name , I wish to change my sons name to my last name my partner had agreed how do I go about things from here ?? Any help would be appreciated thx
Cassie 17 Mar 2018
My daughter is 3 and I’ve not lived with her dad, she has his last name but I want to add my last name after his but he’s said no, do I need permission to do this or can I just change it so she has the same surname as myself and her brother I had from a previous partner thanks
Cassie 17 Mar 2018
My daughter is 3 and I have been lived with her dad, he’s on the birth certificate but I want to add my surname after he’s and he’s said no so could I just change it with out his permission or can I add my name by deed poll, thanks
SeparatedDads Editor 19 Feb 2018
You would have to apply directly to court. However, as a rule, the other parent with parental responsibility has to be consulted and asked permission of first before Deed Poll will consent to this, As in all cases, the court’s main concern is the welfare of the child in question. The court will always put the child’s best interests first and this main issue will determine the outcome of any application for an order. So it doesn't mean the court will naturally reverse the process. Another angle to consider is whether your ex has changed your child's name unofficially i.e through school, GP etc, which your ex can do if she chooses without going through official channels.
Jimbob 18 Feb 2018
I’ve just found out that my ex partner has changed my daughters name officially by deed poll without my consent, I’m named on her birth certificate, have parental responsibility, full active involvement in her life, we see each other all the time, and I willingly pay maintenance for her care. What are my options to get this action reversed?
SeparatedDads Editor 15 Feb 2018
You would have to ask your ex's permission, , which should help answer your question.
Khulet 15 Feb 2018
My eldest child which is 8 years old now have his fathers surname, and we have been separated since my child is born.. I have my own family now im married for 2 years and my eX boyfriend who is my eldest biological father have his own family as well how can i change my sons surname to my husband surname now?? Do i need to ask for my eX's permission?i hope you can help me.. Thanks
SeparatedDads Editor 22 Jan 2018
If your husband does not have parental responsibility of your children, you do not have to ask his permission to change their names, you only need ask the other parent who has PR.
Mpe 22 Jan 2018
Hi I got married and already had two kids which are not my husband's, I change my two kids surname to my husband surname and now I feel like I have made a mistake. is it possible to change my kids surname to my maiden surname?
SeparatedDads Editor 15 Jan 2018
If the father doesn't agree to the name change, then your fiance can either suggest mediation to her child's father and if he refuses, then she would have to apply to court for the court to make a decision what it thinks is in her child's best interests. You can see more via which
Diegorolo 14 Jan 2018
My fiance has a little 10 months boy from another father registered in the birth certificate and he doesn't agree to change the child surname. They were not married and they didn't live together with the child just for 4 months bc he was violent but he denied it when he got arrested. Now in court even if the process is for child arrangements only he admitted he was violent so I don't know if we could go further again with that proof plus a text threating the mother a couple.of months ago. They are in court for child arrangements and he stopped to pay maintainance. I am gonna marry the mother and I would like to give this kid my name, specially bc he thinks I'm the father and I'm the one maintaing him and loving him. Is there anything we could do? I think this would be very stressful for the kid when he get a bit older and start to understand.
SeparatedDads Editor 9 Jan 2018
The resident parent of your child, can change your child's name unofficially (i.e through schools or GP etc). However, as specified in the article, if you have parental responsibility of your child, your ex would have to request your permission to change your child's name officially, for further information.
tony 8 Jan 2018
my ex I left want change the boys surname I pay child maintenance see the boys twice a month her new husband how to change the surname to his at school can this happen
MarkGG Editor 21 Dec 2017
@MamaE - If you are in the UK (usually births are registered after the birth, not at the time of), then you would have to ask the named father for consent. If he doesn't give it, you would have to apply to court.
MamaE 20 Dec 2017
The father listed on my 4year olds birth certificate is not the father . At the time both my ex and I believed he was the father . He wanted my son to have his last name . I wanted my son to have my last name since him and I were not married . While in the hospital o had a c section and was given morphine . So the whole time I was groggy pretty much . While I was asleep he put my sons name down on paper . I woke up and was told to sign papers being a first time mother I signed it LATER realizing he put his last name and not mine. I wasn't really upset but I did have a preference of my last name . A week later my sons features started to develop and he did not look like my ex . I told him , instead he looked like my (friend at the time) since then I've never asked him for any money and favors or any father responsibilities from him . My sons biological father has been fathering him since 3weeks of birth and has been a GREAT father . I want to remove the father listed on the birth certificate and add my now husband his biological father and change my sons last name .Would I have to have my ex's consent ? Can I show my marriage license to change his last name and add biological father to the BC? Or would a DNA test be required
SeparatedDads Editor 11 Dec 2017
If you registered your ex as the father on the birth certificate, then it means he has 'parental responsibility' in which case you would have to request his consent, , for more advice. If he is not registered on the birth certificate, then you can change your daughter's name without his consent.
Skittles 9 Dec 2017
I'm a person who as never writen down my feelings for help for advise on how to deal with my problems before. Please bear with me to try to explain my situation on how I feel and what situation I'm in for me to ask for your help???? I'm a single parent from day one when I found out I was pregnant I told the father I was pregnant On the same day He told me he was back with his ex When I delivered Maisie he came to hospital to believe Maisie was his Maisie was my world from this day The father saw Maisie once a week until he changed his girlfriend The father only saw Maisie when he liked we are not married and never together when Maisie was born Do I mother of Maisie have the right to change Maisie name without consent of the father???
SeparatedDads Editor 14 Nov 2017
If your ex will not consent to the name change, then you would have to apply to court. However, it is likely the court would allow this on the basis of family uniformity. Until you choose to change your son's name by Deed Poll, you can request your local GP and son's school (when he starts) allow him to use his new family name unofficially.
Nat 13 Nov 2017
I have a 4 year old. I want to change his surname to the same as mines and his brother. My child has contact with his dad. We never lived as a family for long (10 weeks) due to domestic violence. He was only given his surname as my ex threatened me. I don’t want my child to feel he’s different or excluded especially when my other child starts at the same school. Would the courts grant the name change.
SeparatedDads Editor 3 Nov 2017
You would still have to ask your children's father permission to change his chidlren's surname. If he refuses, then you would have to make a court application. If your ex only has occasional contact with his children and for the sake of 'uniformity' of name, then it is likely the court would grant permission. Please see the Deed Poll link here for more information.
E 2 Nov 2017
Sorry I did post this down line but never had directed reply so... Hi I have 2 children with my ex partner we was never married but lived together for 4 years . He is on the 2 childrens birth certificate but the children have my last name . Now I have been with my current partner over 6 years now we have had 2 children together .. there also my last name . But we want to get married and want all children have same name . He has had no contact nothing side splitting we have had lots of abuse of himself and his family but nothing sorting out . We don't receive any money never had . Where do I stand thank you
SeparatedDads Editor 16 Oct 2017
I am sorry to hear this. If your son is genuinely upset, then you should either attempt to speak to his dad about the matter, and if you cannot agree between you, request he attends mediation. Perhaps, you could take the emphasis from yourself and say to his dad that it is no attempt to usurp his parenthood, but it is at the request of your son. Most courts would allow a change of name if it fits in with family uniformity. As in all cases, the court’s main concern is the welfare of the child in question. The court will always put the child’s best interests first and this main issue will determine the outcome of any application for an order. Hopefully it won't come to this and mutual negotiation may help. However, if your ex dislikes your current partner, he may quite obviously object. Reminding him, that it is not about the adults, but your child may help. In addition, you can use your name unofficially i.e in school etc without your ex's permission.
Khug 15 Oct 2017
My son is 7 soon, from my previous relationship, I've since married and had another son. He's sees his dad and step mum 2 times a week, I can talk to his step mum about most things we regularly go out together to she's more of a Friend, his dad... well its strained since he attacked my now husband. My son has recently started crying that he's different from us, it break my heart, he asks why can't his little brother me and his step dad have a name like him, I've explained as best I can why they have different names and why I do and his step dad does. It actually makes him worse :,( This has been going on for a month Now, every day he asks if he has step dad's name yet. I've asked him out right do you really want it and he's pretty addimant that it's what he wants, he gets literally hysterical about it. So I thought I could add on my new surname to his, double barrel?? But I have a feeling his dad is going to be difficult and have no idea how I even address this with him, any advice? I really want to keep this out of court because I feel it will tarnish the already strained coparenting we have going. He used to be so amicable we both were but the past year has been hellish with him.
E 16 Sep 2017
Hi I have 2 children with my ex partner we was never married but lived together for 4 years . He is on the 2 childrens birth certificate but the children have my last name . Now I have been with my current partner over 6 years now we have had 2 children together .. there also my last name . But we want to get married and want all children have same name . He has had no contact nothing side splitting we have had lots of abuse of himself his family but nothing sorting out . We don't receive any money never had . Where do I stand thank you
SeparatedDads Editor 5 Sep 2017
If your child is living with the father, then it stands to reason the father might want family uniformity. You can see more whichHowever, if you have parental responsibility of your child, your ex has to request your permission to change your child's name. If you refuse, he would have to apply to court.
Mum2071 3 Sep 2017
Hi my daughter has just turned 8 she has had my surname since birth but her father recently got married and is going on wanting her name changed to match his and his new family. He has brainwashed our daughter into thinking she wants this too but I don't want to change. I'm not sure what to do in this situation thanks
MummyB 12 Aug 2017
So my son is 2 next month and starting nursery. When we registered him his dad came to the register but our son was put into my name due complications with our relationship ship and I thort it was just for the easiest. We have everything sorted and he has been a mayjor part in my child's life for the last 2 years and we are now engaged we are looking to changing my sons name to his dads. Preferably before he starts nurserys to prevent confusion. How do I do this? Will it change his birth cirtificate or have a deep poll? Help please?
SeparatedDads Editor 10 Aug 2017
We cannot make a decision on your behalf. However, much depends upon what your son wants and what YOU think is in his best interests. If you can remove your personal feelings from the equation, this will help. If you wished to challenge your son's mother's decision, then you would have to apply through court to try to prevent it. This would cost financially as well as emotionally. A name is just a name, your son will always be your son. While emotionally, it may be difficult for you to accept this, in the greater scheme of things it does not detract upon the loving relationship you can continue to have with your son. It is understandable that while he is a child, he may wish to appear in school to have exactly the same name as his brother. If he has a slightly different name, his school friends will always question this and this is perhaps what he doesn't want. There is no saying that when he is older, he might wish to change it back. I'm sure you'll feel better in yourself if you let him change his name with your blessing and at the same time reassure him that his relationship with you will stay the same. Another option is to ask your son's mother to keep the double-barelled name on the birth certificate, and use whatever name he chooses for the purposes of his GP and school. The school should allow this.
Tosh 8 Aug 2017
My name his on birth certificate from birth but if his name changes from calum David horn my name too calum David Thurston his step dad will my name be taken off my the birth certificate or does it have to be double barrel or not or dosent that matter could it still be my name still on birth certificate and still name change
Tosh 8 Aug 2017
So what your advice please need to know asap as need a desistion now my son says he just wants Thurston his step dad name am I been selfish and not letting it happen as I know he is mine and that don't change anything I just hate the fact that my name has to be taken out should I do it does that make me a bad dad if I let it happen and fight for my name would that feel like I don't love him enough In letting it happen
SeparatedDads Editor 8 Aug 2017
A name change does not mean your son's stepdad will have any further rights and neither does it give him parental responsibility rights. If your name is not on your son's birth certificate, then you can apply to court for parental responsibility
Tosh 8 Aug 2017
My ex wants my son name changed to her now married name but to take my name out what power then does she have to do if she wanted too and my son new step dad does he have more power then me and if he had parent responsibility does that give him more right then me if my name stays in as a double barrel will they still use my name at school as he wants Thurston to be like his brother how does that work and what about birth certificate if my name is not on the birth certificate does thSt mean I can't do stuff like holiday or bank account savings for him
SeparatedDads Editor 3 Aug 2017
If you are the biological father of your child, then you are by law responsible for helping to financially support him.
SeparatedDads Editor 3 Aug 2017
You don't say whether you have requested the school changes his name already. If the school is refusing that you change his name 'unofficially' to your preferred surname, you may ask a solicitor to write the school a letter requesting a name change on the basis of 'family uniformity'.
Paul 2 Aug 2017
My ex partner changed my son's name through court order with my consent first I knew of this was when I received a letter saying g I was no longer legally responsible for him ? 3 years letter have received a letter from child maintenance for payments as she has contacted them! What is the situition regarding this?
K 2 Aug 2017
Hi. I've been dealing with an absent father of my first son since he was born. I was never married to this guy but he is on my sons birth certificate. My son goes by my husbands surname and only knows him as his father since day one. How can I convince the school to let my baby go by what his name really is and being changed to before showing any documents. I don't think it's right for the school to want to have my son confused as to what his last name is. It's not right to put a child through that when he's been through enough already. Is there anyway to get them to at least hyphenate it until his name is changed to everyone else's name in my household? Please help!
SeparatedDads Editor 10 Jul 2017
If your son's name was changed unofficially and he is moving school, it is likely the name he is using currently would be transferred over to the new school.
Daz 9 Jul 2017
Hi I have full parental response ability. Was married to ex. Son has a know as name with her new partner. I've not given consent for this. My son is moving to secondary school Sept. Can they keep this surname or will it go back to my surname?
Myers 7 Jul 2017
Hi can my ex wife change her daughters name to my name even though she is not my child and my ex wife has kept my surname
SeparatedDads Editor 27 Jun 2017
Please see gov.uk link here which will help you further.
Tricky 26 Jun 2017
Ex girlfriend changed some of my daughter birth certificate name how can I find out new name
SeparatedDads Editor 26 Jun 2017
If the person registered on the birth certificate gives their permission, then yes you can change the surname. Please see Deed Poll which
Small 26 Jun 2017
My ex and I we changed the kids surname to his only to find out 7 year later that my son is nt his ,so can I change my kids surname to mine cuz we were not married he only paid a bit of lobola he didn't pay it all.I want to change them to my surname
SeparatedDads Editor 23 Jun 2017
You can see more whichIf you genuinely cannot find your child's biological father and he is not traceable through CMS, then you would have to apply through court. If the biological parent is absent, then the court will decide upon what it thinks would be in the best interests of your son.
Hannah 22 Jun 2017
Hey wondered if anyone can shed any light, Iv been married for 4 years and have 3 children & 1 on the way. My 2 eldest boys are from a previous partner. One of which has his biological father on his birth cert. BUT my maiden name. They are already known at school/doctors/hospital to have my marital family name. But my question is for my son who has his father on the birth cert (who has had no contact with him for 5 years) and I have no idea where in the world he is or how to contact him, can I change his name to my marital name without his father's concent? I have the same question on obtaining a passport for him too.
Amber 21 Apr 2017
My daughter's last name is peters ...she has a sever speech disorder. Her father and I were never married. .he has seen her 3 times since 2014...she is getting made fun of not only for her speech but also beca use her last Name sounds very perverted....I talked to her father about it ... he's never around hardly ...but on..birth certificate. He says she is tough she will be okay after she fights a bunch.... uh hello ....she don't need that....what can I do of anything about getting her last name changed to mine..
NanaKay 13 Apr 2017
My sons daughter was in care when we found out about her existence. DNA proved he was the biological father and after a long court process the fathers name on the birth certificate was changed to that of my sons and a court awarded him full custody of his daughter. My granddaughters biological mother still has parental consent and has weekly contact with her. My granddaughter is now 9 and wants to change her surname from that of her mother to our family name. When I have looked at deed poll it says that the man originally named on my granddaughters birth certificate would still have parental and we would need his consent as well as the mothers to change my granddaughters surname, this would be impossible as we have no way of knowing where he is now. The biological mother has no problem with the surname change. How would we go about doing this as this is a major thing for my granddaughter. Thanks in advance
SeparatedDads Editor 12 Apr 2017
You can apply whichThe process is quite straightforward, so he should not have any problems making the change.
Dan 11 Apr 2017
Hi my partners mum changed his sur name twice while he was growing up. He originally had his fathers surname but when he and his mother divorced and she re married she changed it to her new husbands. A few years later they also divorced and she re married again and once again changed his name this time officially through the court. He is now 27 years old and expecting a child and would like to change his name back to his biological fathers how do we do this please?
Deb 6 Apr 2017
Hiya I have an 8 year old daughter and her dad don't see her are have any contact he hasn't seen her since she was 11week old my problem is she has his surname and I did change it by depoll but the passport office said her passport has to be her dads name cos it's not a court order any help would be grate x debs
Parker 24 Mar 2017
My husband has a son with his ex wife and she has married an Albanian man. He is 25 and she is 49. Can she change their sons name so that his middle name is her new husbands surname without consent or does consent only apply to surnames? The fact she is changing thei sons name without asking her ex husband seems rather odd. Looking forward to your response.
Gary 14 Mar 2017
My daughter has twins with our last name. She was not married but the twins are now 5 years. She is now plan on getting married and her boy friend asked permission to marry her but I told him I didn't want the twins last name changed. He agreed. Now my daughter said after they get married he wants to adopt the twins. Can they still keep their last names they had when they were born as on their birth certificate?
renu 8 Mar 2017
Hello...i and my husband are not living together anymore we are seprated but not divorced can i change my daughter surname to my surname ....
Agulera 4 Mar 2017
If I with my boyfriend are not married but when child will birth I would like to give my surname because I don't know about our situation in future. But if we will married in a future is it be difficult to change baby's surname to his surname?
skm 3 Mar 2017
Me & my ex have to two but his always been in & out of they lives due to New gf ect but for the past year & half he hasn't botherd only if he sees them in street. But my kids have asked if they could change they nanas back to mine as up untill 4-5years ago I put him on that birth certificates along with his last name....Big mistake I know! But could I change it back as his text n said I could.
SeparatedDads Editor 1 Mar 2017
Your ex is allowed to change your son's name informally i.e through school, doctors etc without consent. However, officially your son would still have your name on his birth certificate and passport. If your ex wishes to change your son's name via deedpoll, then she would have to request your consent. If you say no, then if she wishes to pursue the matter, she would have to take the matter to court. A court will always decide what it thinks is in the best interests of the child in question. Uniformity is always a consideration in cases such as this i.e if your ex takes her new husband's name and there are other children in the family with the same name, then in order to help your son feel included in the new family, the court will often allow the change. However, it is impossible to predict what a court may decide.
Paul145 28 Feb 2017
Me and my sons mother are no longer together, and he has her surname. I am named on the birth certificate as the father. We are now both in separate relationships with separate children. My son has said that when his mum gets married to her new partner, his surname will change to the new partners. I have regular contact with my son, and pay his mum maintanence every month. Is she legally allowed to do this? And if it goes to court what is the likelihood of the judge ruling in her favour? Or when she gets married as he will have a different surname from both parents and both half-siblings would the ruling go in my favour to give him my surname?
SeparatedDads Editor 17 Feb 2017
You can see more whichIf your husband has parental responsibility (which I assume he has) then there shouldn't be an issue.
Mrs G 16 Feb 2017
HI quick query my husband is the biological father of his children his wife passed away a few years ago and we have since married, his 3 boys live with us and carry their mothers maiden name even though their mother took my husbands surname when she married him, they did intend changing all 3 boys into their dads surname but did not get round to it before his late wife passed away, the problem is that my husbands name is not on the birth certificate, how do we go about changing the 3 boys names to his surname, the boys are aged 10, 14 & 16, thank you in advance?
LILMISS 10 Feb 2017
hi!I just want to concern my friends decision,, her daughter from her first boyfriend is acknowledged by his father so the kid is using the last name of her father but when my friend got into another relationship her boyfriend wants to use his surname for her child without them getting married,because he said he loves the child...we are against with her decision because we believe it is not possible unless they get married first, then we just found out that she changes her child's surname and we don't know how it happen I think she do the late registration for the birth certificate of the child it means she register the child again using the last name of his boyfriend, and we even found out that we she not use the old name of the child even in school, the child will start in scratch again.
Dmk 25 Jan 2017
Hi, I have two kids with my ex. The youngest uses my surname while the eldest uses his. I tried to talk to him to change her surname to mine so she doesn't feel like she's not part of the family but he refused. What can I do?
Dmk 25 Jan 2017
Hi, I have two kids from the same man but the eldest has her fathers surname ,while the youngest uses my surname. We were legally married , I tried to ask him nicely to change her surname to mine he refused. Now there are two children with different surnames yet from the same man. What can I do?
DellaRossa 21 Jan 2017
Hi there. Just a quick one if anyone can advise. My 9year old sons mother is married to her new man and she tells me that my boy has to change his surname ( my family surname ) to her husbands surname so that he can get a passport so they can go on their hols abroad. Otherwise she says she'll have to take me to court for it. He is the last of my family surname and its causing quite a storm already and I just want peace for all. But he can still get a passport without changing his surname right?
SeparatedDads Editor 18 Jan 2017
It is highly unlikely a court will force a resident parent to change their child's surname, if the resident parent doesn't wish to.
Gretch 17 Jan 2017
My husband has a child from another lady has never been part of the child life. Is registered as father on birth certificate. We pay child support. My husband nw wants to he mother of child to change it to her surname as things a very complicates and we not allowed to see the child or get any info of the child. Will he be allowed to get the surname changed as they where not living partners or married partners. It was just a hook up that ended in pregnancy.
SeparatedDads Editor 5 Dec 2016
As suggested in the article, if your ex refuses the change, you would have to take the matter to court. A court will always decide upon what it thinks is in your child's best interests.
Magee 5 Dec 2016
My child father refuses to change the surname of my child to other surname that I'm using now. I tried to talk to him he said no, now I'm stressed I don't know what to do cause my husband want my child to use his surname place help
kuch 18 Nov 2016
I learnt frm fb tht my wife has remarried while am in jail,can she change my daughter's surname without my permission
kuch 18 Nov 2016
Can my x change my daughter's surname while am in jail without my consent
Charls89 Editor 17 Nov 2016
@kevo - I know this - she change the surname unofficially through school/GP etc without having your consent. Or if you say no to her changing it through deed poll and she doesn't have any contact with you she would have to apply through the court. C.
kevo 16 Nov 2016
Am in jail and my x has remarried,does she has regal rights to change my daughter's surname without my consent
SeparatedDads Editor 30 Sep 2016
While you can refuse permission for your ex to change your child's surname by Deed Poll, you have no specific rights if your ex wishes to change your child's surname informally. You would have to seek legal advice if you wanted to try to prevent this through court, but it doesn't mean the court would necessarily rule in your favour.
Chits 29 Sep 2016
My ex wants to change my child's surname but I have refused and I am on the birth certificate but we were not married. She says she has changed it at the school as she don't need my permission to do this. How do I stand legally when contacting the school to inform them I'm not happy with this and I want it put back to her actual surname? Can I make them do this? My ex has done this without my consent and I have contact with the school and am on all her school documentation.
Mazandy 21 Sep 2016
i apply to change my mothers surname to my father's surname on April this year n i only got one sms saying my request is accepted n still i never got my ID back.How many months does it takes to be ready?
SeparatedDads Editor 13 Sep 2016
Your wife would have to ask consent from her ex (if he is contactable). If he isn't and there is no way of being able to find him to request consent, then your wife would be able to apply through the courts and the court would make a decision based upon what it thought was in her childrens' best interests. If your wife can contact her ex and he refuses, then she would have the option to take the matter to court and the court would make the decision.
Gw 12 Sep 2016
Hi,would like to know.I got married to my wife and she got two sons on her side.My problem is that they are still young and we would like to change there surnames cause they don't know their father....Me and my wife don't want the children to ask questions when they get older why they have a different surname.Can you plz help......
Curt79 2 Sep 2016
Me and my partner have been together since 2008. And living together since. We have another child with my surname and I have another son also with my surname. My partners ex has not had contact ever nor his family and I mean not attempted too. He makes small £30.00 payments every month if his working. He now wants to have the same surname as his brother and sister. His birth certificate is Spanish as this is where he was born and his real dad left before he was ever born. I don't know if as he has a Spanish certificate if the law is the same in terms of changing? If not what do I need to do as he is asking more and I believe starting to affect him
Macey 26 Aug 2016
Hi there please can you offer some advice? My son wishes to change his surname to my name, currently it is double barrelled with his fathers who is on the Birth certificate, his dad has not had contact in over 6 years and I do not know where he is, contact was suspended by the family court and he was not showing up to contact and was using drugs and was in prison ... Yet again!! If I change is name via a court order do you think I would be successful? My son is 12 and very capable and he has requested this change? Also how long does it take? Will I have to go to court? Will they try and locate his dad?
mariska 11 Aug 2016
My child has my stepdad surname because the father don't want any thing to do with the child. I've met a new guy when my child was 5months old. This guy is the only father that my child knows. After 3 years my stepdad still doesn't want to let me change my child's surname to this guy's surname. We will be married soon. Can someone please give me advice.
SeparatedDads Editor 22 Jul 2016
If you wish to change your child's name officially, then you can do so via a court order (if your ex refuses to give consent and the court agrees). I can't imagine why the court wouldn't agree, as the court will always rule in the best interests of the child and uniformity with his other siblings would be a big consideration. In the meantime, you will be within your rights to use the preferred surname and there is little your ex could do. If he threatens you, you can report any threatening behaviour to the police.
SeparatedDads Editor 22 Jul 2016
You would have to apply through Deed Poll agin if you wanted your children's names changed officially. However, if you wanted the children to use your new husband's name unofficially, they could begin using it informally i.e through school/GP etc. But this would mean their official surname would still be their fathers.
Toothie 21 Jul 2016
It needs both parents consent. But the child can seek advice himself through counciling or potentially CAB
Sam84 20 Jul 2016
Hi there, I'm hoping someone can give me advise. I have a 9 year old son by an ex partner-never married. He was very abusive throughout are relationship and was arrested for assaulting me and threatening to kill me in front of our son when he was two. We have on occasions had periods where we are civil for our sons sake but he is often verbally abusive still towards myself and my family. He is not at all a hands on dad and doesn't co parent in any way and only sees my son at his convenience. He has had numerous partners since we split and always puts his social life before our son. His family also make no attempts to play active roles and even fail to send him birthday cards etc. Anyway the problem I'm having is my son desperately wants to change his surname to mine and has been asking for almost two years. He says he can't understand why he has his dad's family name when he doesn't really know any of them. I have two other children and he desperately wants to be the same as his siblings. My son has a diagnosis of ADHD and anxiety. He is often teased by peers about his surname(Bird) this adds to his existing problems. He is moving schools in September to the same school his brother will be starting in reception. (He doesn't want more teasing) I have asked his dad if he can be known as my surname just within the school as a preferred surname. He told me to F off!!! He will not consider my sons feelings. Is my son old enough to be listened to if I applied for a change of surname through the courts? His dad has threatened to go in the school and show me up if I just change it. I know I need his permission to deed poll but the new school told me today he is allowed a preferred surname to make school life easier and for him to be the same as his brother. Will I be doing wrong if I go ahead as its only for within the school community? Please help, I'm very frightened of my ex, he causes me a great deal of upset regularly.(I sought advise from a solicitor recently for help with a non molestaion order but couldn't afford the fees and as he hasn't hurt me in 6 years just being abusive wasn't enough-calling me the c word and saying he hopes I die a terrible death) He is a huge let down to my son, only ever attended one parents evening!! he has a long criminal record, was arrested last October and wasn't in when my son arrived on the Saturday because he was being held! He has Recently taken his new girlfriend and her son on holiday but this weekend refused to collect my son as the cab fair is too expensive! Any advise you could give me would be much appreciated. Many thanks
King Kong 20 Jul 2016
I have change my kids names by deed poll after there dad pass away they have the same surname as me be new partner would like the kids to take his surname as we are getting married what do we have to do
SeparatedDads Editor 19 Jul 2016
No, a change of your child's surname would not affect your benefits.
dobbo 19 Jul 2016
Doester changing the surname effecthe any benefits ie child ben,or child tax etc..
SeparatedDads Editor 7 Jul 2016
Please see gov.uk link here which gives more information on adoption. Plus, you will be able to change your daughter's name by Deed Poll, if your ex has passed away.
Thulz 6 Jul 2016
Hi im a single mother who's unemployed, i have a partner who's intending to marry me. He supports my daughter who's 7years old old, he wants to adopt her legally but she is using her dad's surname who passed away 5years ago.please help
venus 25 Jun 2016
hi my name is divine...I am married..I want to change my daughters surname to my second husband surname.....my child carrying the fathers surname but we didn't married..her father didn't give support but he refused to change my child surname..my second husband and I supporting my child...what can i do? i need advice s
SeparatedDads Editor 22 Jun 2016
Please see Deed Poll site here which will give you more information.
Mirela 21 Jun 2016
Hi, I'm married and I have a daughter, but she is not my husband's child, the biological father has never been involve in her life, and on her birth certificate she has his surname. I have changed her father surname with mine via Deed Pool,before I got married, so now I want her to have my married surname since my husband is the one in her life, what can I do?
SeparatedDads Editor 20 Jun 2016
As specified in the article, it may be possible for a mother to change her child's surname by Deed Poll without the consent of a father (who has parental responsibility) who is absent and his whereabouts is not known
sweetmint_11 20 Jun 2016
hello..i need some advice.My son is turning 7 years old, i want to change his surname to mine. His father don't give any support or even visit him for years.what should i do? I don't even know my son's father where about. Can i change it even without his consent? Thank you in advance.
Saj 17 Jun 2016
I have 3 children from a previous marriage and I have recently got married again and wanting to change my children's surnames. Ex has given consent for name change. Does the name change in birth certificates or can this only be done by deed poll? Also they have existing passports will I be able to change it on there too? Thank you
SeparatedDads Editor 14 Jun 2016
If your ex does not agree to the name change then you would have to take the matter to court. You don't say how old your daughter is, as if she is over the age of 11 then the court would take her opinion on board. However, the court will always decide what it thinks is in yoru daughter's best interests when coming to any decision.
Dj 13 Jun 2016
My daughter has her mother's name and we are no longer together. I am now married with 3 children and my daughter wants her last name to match her sibling abs my last name. I have Court ordered visitation and pay child support. What can i do.
Ricky 12 Jun 2016
My son is being called by his middle name which is his mother's surname at school with out my consent I'm totally against this as he thinks it's actually his real surname which is confusing as I tell him what his real name is and its confusing him and not fair on his emotional we being ,what can i do as his mother thinks it's fine to play with his mind
SeparatedDads Editor 8 Jun 2016
As specified in the article, if the father has parental responsibility, then you would have to apply to the court if you want your child's name changed officially. If you want to change your child's name unofficially you can use your chosen surname in certain circumstances such as at school and his doctors etc, without authorisation from the father of your child. However, your child will still be registered under your ex's surname on official documents such as passport etc.
kita 7 Jun 2016
Hi I just want advice... my baby 2months old now I want to change his surname to mine but the father dont want to approve it... what can I do??
SeparatedDads Editor 3 Jun 2016
If the biological father is not registered on the birth certificate of your child, then you do not need to ask consent.
Jojo 3 Jun 2016
Helo i would like to find out how to go about it. My 5 year old girl lives with her grandparents (father's parents) for the past 3years due to me (the mother) not working. I have been visiting her on festive seasons cause i'm currently staying in Gauteng and their staying in Port elizabeth, so now i want her to come stay with me seeing i found a very secure job but now they don't approve and another thing is the grand parents don't work and her father moved recently moved out of his parents house because he got married. So i would like to find out how to go about it to get my child the legal way
Andy 3 Jun 2016
Hi, i'm married and i have a daughter, but she is not my husband's child, the biological father has never been involve in her life, and on her birth certificate she has my surname before i got married, so now i want her to have my married surname since my husband is the one in her life, what can i do?
SeparatedDads Editor 1 Jun 2016
Whether you are resident in the UK or abroad your ex still has to ask your consent to change your child's name by Deed Poll if you have PR. However, if you move abroad and your ex decides to take the matter to the court, it will be up to the court to decide what it thinks is in your child's best interests.
Bourbs 31 May 2016
Can my ex change my daughters name without my permission if I move abroad
SeparatedDads Editor 31 May 2016
If your ex has died then consent is not needed. Therefore you can apply directly to change your daughter's name by Deed Poll.
Tina 30 May 2016
Hi my daughters dad passed away when she was 2 she's now turning 6 I have just got married to my partner now and he has taking on a father roll to my daughter and me and my husband are expecting another child in September my daughter knows her real dad passed away and still has regular contact with his family but she has been asking to change her name to the same as mine my husbands and the babies so she isn't left out where do I stand with being able to do that??
SeparatedDads Editor 26 May 2016
You would have to ask for your ex's consent, or be able to prove that you cannot locate him and have tried. If your ex refuses to give his consent then as specified in the article you can appeal to the court. The court will take into consideration whether the name change is necessary and whether it would be detrimental to the child to change their surname.
Kate 26 May 2016
Hi. I split with my husband 11 years ago our daughter was 3 at the time, since the split she hasnt really had anything to do with her dad especially in the last 3 years where he has made no contact with her at all, he has never paid any child maintenance for her, I have been with my current partner for 8 years and my daughter has asked if she can change her surname to his, where do I stand in this? Thanks
SeparatedDads Editor 20 May 2016
We have answered this comment below.
SeparatedDads Editor 20 May 2016
He can apply through the courts, If he does not wish to be represented by a solicitor and have to pay hefty legal fees he can self-litigate as in most cases the court will award PR to the biological father.
Titch 19 May 2016
My partner has a daughter age 13 he and his X split up 7yrs ago he's just been told he has no parental resonablty, can he go to a solicitors and pay to have parental resonablty for his daughter
Titch 19 May 2016
My partner has a daughter, him and his X split 6 yrs ago, he's just found out he has no parental resonablty to his daughter, can he go to a solicitors and have a document and pay and have parental resonablty for his daughter
SeparatedDads Editor 13 May 2016
While your ex may have changed his surname back to hers, she may have not done this officially via Deed Poll, but she may have changed it unofficially through the likes of school or GP etc. This would mean officially he still has your surname for reasons such as his passport etc and which is why your ex never came to you for consent, as consent is not needed to change the name 'unofficially'. With regards to child maintenance, if your ex has named you as the father, then you are responsible for supporting your child until your child leaves education.
Chuck 12 May 2016
Iv not seen my son for 15 years and always paid csa my ex changed his surname back to hers at the age of 14 but I never consent it as I didn't know where tha were from the age of 14 till he was 19 I paid csa even the letters I had of the csa had my surname on them for my son so she never told them of the change can anyone help me on this iv been told that I shouldn't of paid for the last 5 years as I never had any parental rights is this true many thanks
SeparatedDads Editor 11 May 2016
If you are the biological father it does not matter what your child's surname is, you will still be responsible for supporting him financially in his day-to-day care by paying child maintenance.
united85 10 May 2016
hi, just wondering if my ex partner changed my sons surname am i still liable for child support? as if i changed my name from my mother when she died i wouldn't be entitled to the will theory!
SeparatedDads Editor 3 May 2016
If you have Parental Responsibility then your ex is not allowed to change your child's surname by Deed Poll without your consent, regardless of whether you have a non-molestation order. I'm not sure what you are asking with regards to your first question. However, I'll try to anwer it regarding what I think you are asking. If you are concerned about contact under the non-molestation order which affects your ex but not seeing your child, then you may have to instruct a third-party to help with access exchanges etc.
Chaz 2 May 2016
A few questions really- What can I do about a non-molestation order based on lies and here-say against me? Order is preventing contact with ex, but not child (pretty pointless as I never wanted any contact with my ex to begin with) Also with this order having been served is my ex girlfriend allowed to change my child's surname without my permission?
SeparatedDads Editor 20 Apr 2016
Your ex wife can only officially change your daughter's name by Deed Poll with your consent.
Opie 19 Apr 2016
Hi long story short I have joint parental rights for my 10 yr old daughterI also have cour ordered contact...when her mother and I split she changed her (my daughters) name to her maiden name at school/doctors I kept my mouth shut though I wasn't happy now she Is getting married and has plan's on changing my daughters name to this new husbands. I have discussed this with my daughter and she is strongly against it and in fact wants her name back to my name where do I stand and how can I help her.my ex wife will do it regardless of my daughters feelings
Ashley 14 Apr 2016
My phone spell check is insane! How do i write a reply letter to the court.....that i object to my sons father changing my sons name.....how do i address it.....what do i include.....i do not have much time....i have 50% custody but have correctly been away and not involved in my sons life for a little over a year now but plan on doing everything i can to become the mother i once was and fight this battle! I My son has my last name and i do not want that to change. Please help!
Ashley 14 Apr 2016
I have 50/50 custody....to make a LONG story short. I went through a LONG ruff year and have not been in been child life for a year now..t child has my last name and his father is waking the court to change out sons last name to his....i have to write an objetion letter to the court and i do not have much time and i do not know how to do this....his to deny him the chance of changing my sona last name....im hurrengo stuck in hospital dute to heart surgery and can not do much let alone type up a letter.....can some one tell me what i need to do to write this respond to his letter requesting a name change....now.to address the letter and what ro include....im lost w out my attorney....i live in orlando
gaz 8 Apr 2016
my 16 year old daughter has changed her surname to my ex wifes partners name is she allowed to do this I am fully paid up child support for 10 years for my 3 children .do I still have to pay child support for her as her name is no longer the one on the forms
SeparatedDads Editor 22 Mar 2016
Yes, you can do this on informal documents such as doctors, school etc. However, for his passport and any other legal document he would have to be known by the surname on his birth certificate.
Raffy 7 Mar 2016
Hi im a single mother and getting married on the 18th of march this year to an EU CITIZEN and just wonderin how i can change my childs surname to my husband to be surname?...(my childs used my surname as i am a single parent) Hope to hear you soon Thanks
SeparatedDads Editor 2 Mar 2016
You can either ask for the father's consent. If he does not give it, you can take the matter to court and they will judge it based on what is in your daughter's best interests. They will often consent to a name change to keep uniformity across the family. As your daughter is 13, her opinion will also be taken into consideration.
Nesha 1 Mar 2016
Hi i have a 13yr old daughter from a previous relationship but i separated from her father when she was 4yrs old and he hasn't seen her since.. So a few yrs ago i petitioned him to court and i was granted full custody. So now i have been with my husband for 10yrs and he is the only father she knows we also have 3 other children together and we all carry my husband's last name and my daughter has her father's last name but she always questions why she cant have our last name. So my question is? Is that possible i have been dealing with her wanting to change her name for yrs..
claire 18 Feb 2016
I have been seperated from my ex husband a few years we are duvirced he has no con5act what so ever with my children as adviced by social services as he had alcohol and mental health problems .. can i change theyre surname without his consent i font know where he lives we have no way of contact whatso ever and its highly unlikey that the children are ever going to see him ever again
SeparatedDads Editor 17 Feb 2016
I'm afraid we cannot deal with comments from outside the UK, as different countries have different laws.
nomah 17 Feb 2016
Hi I got pregnant 2014 January n I was confusef who is the child for because I was dated some guy at home n during January I left him I go to Jo'burg n I met someone n I sleep. With him so I was confuse that where the child belong but I told that guy from Jo'burg that am preg but I think the child is for that guy from home n when I give birth I go with that guy from home n take child's birth certificate n nou the babe is exactly with that guy from jorbug nou I don't know what to do because my son has false surname and I want to change it please help.
SeparatedDads Editor 5 Feb 2016
I'm afraid as the mother has natural Parental Responsibility for your child from birth, then it is up to her to make the decision regarding what name goes on the birth certificate. It means there is little you can do to have your son's name without her consent.
Sam 4 Feb 2016
My childs mother and myself registered the birth of my son a month after he was born. We are unmarried and not together. His middle name is my surname and he has his mothers surname. I asked to have a double barreled surname but my childs mother refused. Since we were in the registration office I gave in which i now regret. Is there anything that can be done? I feel cheated out of giving him my surname.
Jacq Editor 1 Feb 2016
@lynseyloo It's easy as he is an adult and easy if you wish to change your children's names by deed poll too. You would just have to give your consent.
lynseyloo 1 Feb 2016
Hi there. My partner had his surname changed when he was 10 to his mothers. He is now at an age where he would very much like to change it back but we also have 2 children of our own whose names would change too. Is this a difficult process or is it an easy thing to do?? Thank you in advance :)
fifi 31 Jan 2016
Hi I'm married and I'm using my husband surname and I have another baby with another man so I want to know that is that if I take a birth certificate for my child won't be a problem at home affairs?
Lady H 29 Jan 2016
My daughter has my last name I am her mother but she lives with her father and have has me on child support and I see her on my days of visit ..she is 8 years old and has always had my last name he even signed the birth certificate and didn't have a problem with it then...and he calls me telling me he is hiring a lawyer to change her last name to his...can he do this??
SeparatedDads Editor 28 Jan 2016
The courts will often allow parents to change their children's surnames if they cannot locate the non-resident parent and/or did her best to locate them. If this is not the case and you were easily contactable then you can take the issue to court should you wish and apply to have the names changed back. However, you would have to be aware that the courts may not rule in your favour if the children are accustomed to their new names and have had them for a while. You would also have to be aware that although the children may be using their new names, they may not have been officially changed by Deed Poll and may have been unofficially changed for purposes such as school etc. You may wish to find this out before you begin spending money on legal fees etc.
Bluenose85 27 Jan 2016
Hi, I have just found out my Ex wife has re married and changed me 3 children's sur names without my permission. I haven't seen my children or ex wife for over 5 years but have been paying regular CSA payments every month. Where do I stand and what can I do? Thank you BlueNose
SeparatedDads Editor 22 Jan 2016
I'm afraid as a UK-based site, we can only advise on UK-based issues.
Jada 22 Jan 2016
Good day My ex-husband does not want to consent to me changing our daughter's surname to my maiden name but he is not an active part in my daughter's life at all. Please advise which courts i can approach in Cape Town. Thanking you kindly Jade Martin
SeparatedDads Editor 12 Jan 2016
If he ex has parental responsibility, then she would have to request his permission to change the surname. If he refuses, then she would have to apply for permission through the courts and the judge will decide whether it is in the best interests of her children.
ted633 12 Jan 2016
Asking advise for my girlfriend rearly. She has 2 kids with her ex boyfriend and has his surname. The kids dad hasnt been there for em most of there lifes n when hes been in the picture hes let them down time n time again n hasnt had any contact with my girlfriend for about 3 months. Cos hes much happier partying n doing drugs. My girlfriend has had enough n wants her kids to have her surname. Whats best way to get what she deserves n what she wants. If i marry my girlfriend corse she will have my name can we then change the kids name to my surname. We just want em either changing to myn or hers advise plzzz
SeparatedDads Editor 5 Jan 2016
A name change will not affect your parental responsibility or your legal rights. If you have concerns of your ex moving abroad, then you may be able to apply for a Prohibited Steps Order through the courts. A PSO is an order granted by the court in family cases which prevents either parent from carrying out certain events or making specific trips with their children without the express permission of the other parent. This is more common in cases where there is suspicion that one parent may leave the area with their children. While there is no guarantee the application will be successful, this is an option you can explore.
cs 4 Jan 2016
I have an 18mnth old child and me and his mother split up in the summer. She now wants to change his last name to match hers. If she does this, will it effect any legal rights that I would have over him? He stays with me every weekend and don't want her to be able to stop that or move abroad with him
SeparatedDads Editor 16 Dec 2015
If he has PR, you would have to have his consent to change your child's name. If your ex refuses, you could also apply through the courts on the grounds you want a unified family name for your children.
Jodybeat 15 Dec 2015
I've three children , 2 from ex husband and one from ex partner . My ex husband doesn't bother about our kids , he hasnt seen them in 11 years . My ex partner tricked me into calling our baby his surname by saying he wanted our relationship to work , as soon as he got his way he ended things There's 3 different surnames in my household, can I change the names so my children all have the same name without consents
karen 28 Sep 2015
I have two girls ages 5&7 I left their father for another man who was released from prison on and aggravated assault charge with a deadly weapon Me and the guy who was released are now getting married and he wants to adopt my kids giving them his last name... Is that at all possible?
JayJay 5 Sep 2015
Hi I need help I have four children my oldest two are by the same dad he's hasn't had contact with them since they where 1&2 they are now 10&11 and my younger two has never had contact with there dads all the children are on my last name but the older twos dad are on the birth certificate I want to marry my partner but want us all to have same last name can I change there name ????
S 82 12 Aug 2015
My 7 year old Daughter has my surname, her biological dad is NOT on birth certificate nor has he seen Her in over 3years, I get married next year and my daughter wants to change her surname like me to my future husbands, do we have to get married before I can change her surname?
damian 8 Jul 2015
Hi every1 , my ex has got my sons school to call him jayden hartley in stead of jayden hartley lad which is the name that is on the birth certificate . im very worried that shes trying to make every1 think thats what he's called , especially now that he's been diagnosed with autism . will the name he has ( on the birth certificate ) be on all the official things like passport , drivers licence ( whens he's old enough ) , bank acount ( whens he's old enough ) , doctors , dentists . this is causing me considerable stress and would appreciate any help .
Kay 8 Jul 2015
Hiya I am wanting to change my lil girl surname she has got her father surname as that what we agreed that it would get carryed on how would I go about changing her name as she hasn't seen her father in two year then as soon as her nana and grandad went to count he was straight there to try and get contract with thou there count order iv got paper to explain evey think I havnt seen or heard anythink for her father in a long time and my bf who I been with for three year now and brough my draught up and now iv got a lil boy to my bf just want the best way to go and get her name changed
Angie 1 Jul 2015
Hi I'm a single mom from,Johannesburg South-africa. My daughter is 3,her natural/biological father is not registered on her birth certificate as he threw me out when I was 3 months into my pregnancy...he has made no contribution financially and has never made an effort to know our child or to see her after I've tried for 6months after her birth to give him a chance to apply for parental rights etc which he never did ,so basically my daughter doesn't know her biological father at all...and he hasn't been a part of my daughters life in any way shape or form since I was 3 months pregnant...we also were never married and only knew each other for 6moths before I realized I was pregnant...he then threw me out 3 months later which stating the obvious indicates we were only together for a duration of nine months....) so my question is...if I get married to a man that is not het biological father but who has been an active part of my child's life for the past 2 years and my daughter calls him daddy and he has acted as her dad in every possible way personally and financially except that he is in fact not by blood relation her natural biological father...and I want to change my child and my surname to this mans surname when getting married,is it a legal requirement for me to ask permission from my child's biological father who has had nothing to do with my child's life and upbringing since he threw me out? If so then I have no problem follow the correct legal steps to do the name change lawfully...but I cannot see how my child's biological father could have any legal rights to appose a surname change as he hasn't been a part of her life at all and if she doesn't even know of her fathers actual existence..please help!
leal 27 Jun 2015
My 6 year old daughters biological father has just been revealed, does he have the right to change her last name??
SeparatedDads Editor 4 Jun 2015
@Carolyn - as a rule his father would have to consent to the name change if he has Parental Responsibility. However, there are exceptions to the rule when a parent can sometimes change their child's name without gaining this consent. To do so, the fathers whereabouts must be unknown and you should have attempted to contact him before making the name change application. If you contact him and he refuses, you would have to take it to court. As specified in the article, the court will take into consideration whether the name change is necessary and whether it would be detrimental to the child to change their surname, or in some cases to not change their surname. For example, if one child in a family unit had a different surname to the rest of the family, this may be considered as detrimental to the child and therefore the court may allow the change. I hope this help.
CaptainA 4 Jun 2015
I am the father of a child who has had a different surname from birth. She is now 5 years old and she has 3 older half sisters who all carry the same name as she. When the child was born I was told she was not mine. The other gentleman was told that she was his. Most members of the family at the time knew this was a lie and the mother in question knew this was a lie. Eventually the father had to admit this to himself as well. The mother from the moment of my daughters birth engaged in what was tantamount to the kidnapping of a child. This was done willfully on her part. When she was giving birth I was frantically calling around town to different hospitals to try and find where she was because I knew the child could potentially be mine. All attempts to contact the mother failed. After my daughters birth I didn't hear anything from any of the family so I eventually assumed the child was the other gentleman's if not someone else's all together, but likely not mine. The mother on the other hand now tells me she knew the child was mine. For there were only two candidates. I can understand the child's need to be a part of her family which now is only her 3 sisters for the other gentleman was in and out of relationships with the mother and is now out. When a child is kidnapped do they typically retain the surname that the kidnappers gave them? What are some of the court proceedings one goes through in such a situation where the rescued child is given their real fathers surname? To me this whole thing seems like a major injustice. My naming rights as her father were completely denied to me for one. And my child was essentially kidnapped from me for almost 3 years. I only saw her a few times during this period. In today's day and age with numerous mixed family units it should not be considered as detrimental as it has been for a child to carry a different surname than the other children in a family which now has yet another man taking on the fatherly roll. Thanks for any advice in advance. We are in NY.
Carolyn 2 Jun 2015
My 15yr old son wants to.change his last name to my maiden name. His father has had no contact with him for 3 yrs. I do receive child support through automatic payroll deduction. Can we change his name without his father's approval since he's had no contact with him? Thank you
m 27 May 2015
Can my 15 yr old change his surname with mothers consent.Without the absent father being involved. I have recently changed my 16 yrs olds surname but the 15 year old is left behind. Thank you
Benj 20 May 2015
I've just learnt my 4 year old daughter is going by her mothers surme when on the birth certificate she has my surname can she change it without my consent I haven't seen my daughter in 2 years but I pay CSA should o seek legal help as I cannot speak to my ex and I don't know where they live anymore either. Advice would be great thanks.
SeparatedDads Editor 19 May 2015
@jp - it sounds like you may be from the US and because we are a UK-based service, I'm afraid I can't answer your question having no knowledge US laws. I hope you find the answer.
jp 15 May 2015
my daughter Called me to ask if she could change her surname to her mom's new husbands surname.her mom changed her older sons surname when we were married to mine. Now she's remarried and wants to change my daughter's Surname. I pay childsupport and medical expenses for her older son and my daughter. I told them If they want to change it, her moms new husband would have to adopt her and I will stop paying child support and insurance for her and her my ex older son. can they adopt her and I stop paying child support. my ex only calls me or let's ne co.e around when she needs something. my daughter is a teen by now and I honestly believe it's her mom telling her to ask for this. She told me the same story her mother told me years ago when she asked me to give her older son my surname...
Alisha Editor 22 Apr 2015
@Good dad - she may not have changed it by deed-poll, I think you can unofficially use another name for school records etc. I'd check with your ex. As a rule she would need your consent, but as she hasn't really changed the name, but added to it, she may have found a loophole. But remember a name is just a name, she is still your biological daughter and that counts for more than words on paper.
Good dad 20 Apr 2015
I got married to my ex wife in 1995. We have a child together that was born in 2002. We officially divorced in 2009. We have joint custody however my access was reduced when her and her partner moved over 100 miles away. Now I have her every other weekend and 1/2 the school holidays. She is 12 years old. She has my surname "Regan" Her school closed recently and has started a new school today. I have just received the invoice for the school fees and notice that my ex wife and her boyfriend have changed my daughters surname. They have registered her as having a surname of "Hope-Regan" my ex wife's boyfriends name is "Hope" I am devastated, can she do this? I was shocked to see what they had done.
Liz Editor 14 Apr 2015
@Joanne - You may be able to get it changed if you apply for a court order. A parent may be allowed to change their child's name, especially if you have reverted to your maiden name and want the same for your children. The court may agree if you say you wish your family unit to operate under one name.
Joanne 10 Apr 2015
I been divorced 10 years from my ex husband he as no contact with my children as not for years I want to change there surname to my maiden name but he won't give me permission Can anyone advise me
Tom 1 Apr 2015
I have just today discovered that my ex-partner had changed my daughters name in 2012. Up until now i dint even know that it had been changed. But the strange thing is my daughter had often said to me her name was Brown and i just thought she was getting mixed up as thats her mothers name. Maybe I have got this wrong but i think that must be illegal even though my ex has tried everything possible to keep me out of my daughters life. My daughter is 8 and i haven't seen her for over a year because of my ex which has included false allegations
Val Editor 4 Mar 2015
@Suri - you can apply to change your son's surname to yours by deed poll, but you will have to have your ex's permission. If he doesn't agree then you will have to take it to court and the court will decide.
Suri 2 Mar 2015
My ex who I wasn't married to failed to tell me that he was already married and had a wife and daughter in London. I had a son with him during the 10 years and found out after about his deceit , in the meantime he sent a letter from his solicitor as he couldn't come to register my sons birth , and has been adding to the birth certificate . I'm sure there must be something I can without involving him to change my sons surname to mine ???
SeparatedDads Editor 2 Mar 2015
@jon - you can really only take this back to court for a contact order, and tell the court what you are telling us, that she has done everything to cut ties between you and your children. You don't have to agree to a change of names, but I think the best thing you can do is to fight for the rights to see your kids. However, the longer it goes on the more difficult it will be. If you have not seen them for a long period of time, then she will have more leverage to get the courts to agree to her taking them back home to France. So you need to try and re-establish that contact asap.
jon 26 Feb 2015
2 years ago my ex partner left me after she was found to have taken money from work. She went to visit her sister in London and took our 2 children with her. At that time 3years old and 3month old boys. She accused me of domestic violence and had a non molestation order and a prohibited steps order placed against me. These allegations were false and used as a bargaining chip to stop her being imprisoned as she was found guilty of theft of £14.000 and sentenced to 18 months probation and 100 hours of community service. We finally went to court and the court gave me unserpervised access to my children every other Saturday for 2 months with the option to then progress this over weekends. After the period of 2 months every time I wanted to see my children she would say they are sick or they were busy or out of the country as her parents live in France. She cut all contact and I have had no information on my children or seen them for 16 months. The children both have my surname and I am named on both birth certificates so I have parental responsibility. I recently received a letter saying she was attempting to stop the order as she, again falsely accused me of not feeding my children or changing my youngest nappies on visits. She also stated that my eldest son was seeing a councillor due to the fictional abuse. I have not been consulted at any stage with regards to health matters, schooling or any part of the lives my children now lead. I am a father who has always supported my children and I pay child support for my children. She has now asked to change the children's names. I believe she is trying to cut all ties so that she can move the children to France. My relationship with my children has always been wonderful as many character witnesses proved in court and I find myself now 16 months on being denied access by my ex partner and not knowing where to turn for help. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. My priority always has been and will be my children. Kind regards Jon
dee 6 Feb 2015
My little girl is 3 and my ex see her regularly and pays maintanence but he is very bossy and a bit of a control freak, he is on the birth certificate and I asked if I cud add my surname to double barrel it to his and mine but he just said no with no reason why not is it possible for me to do it without his consent? My bigger worry is that he is making my daughter go backwards she is autistic and likes things the same she doesn't like change but can loose her temper when things change like taking her to a different hotel when her daddy comes for her. I have been potty training and she has done really well she has been dry during the day for nearly a month now and always asks if she wants to go but my ex has had her for more days just recently because it was her birthday and it was his year to have her but he won't help her have a wee when outside and he says she doses t ask so has started putting her back in pull ups which she doesn't like. He took her to nursery who were shocked to see her in them so took them off. She went on to wet herself twice throughout the day and didn't say anything. The nursery had words with my ex about it and said they thought it might have been because she had been away from me for longer than usual that she had started wetting herself to which he replied "don't be so ridiculous" the next day she came to nursery in a pull up again so they took it off her but like the day before she wet herself and even had a poo in her pants something she hadn't done for four weeks. I went to pick her up that day and as usual she rang to me and hugged me. Nursery told me wot had been happening and I said I knew as I had been sent text messages from him which I showed them, they were shocked at how abusive he was and he blocked me so I couldn't reply to him. they said that she never held onto his leg like she does mine in a morning and never ran to him when he came to pick her up and I had the same thoughts as the nursery that she was unsettled and maybe even a bit warey of her daddy. He won't work with me and the nursery and will only do things his way, he tells her off when she has a wee without telling him and going to her potty or the toilet, can I stop contact while he is acting in such a way that she has come home a different child, she is not speaking as much and when asked a question just looks down. I am still blocked from getting in touch with him but when I can he is very abusive to me and calls me an idiot and other unpleasant things and always swearing at me. Where do I stand I don't know what to do can anyone help?
B.Thomas 6 Feb 2015
My boyfriends ex wife wants to take his name off their daughters birth certificate. He is not her biological father but loves and provides for her. She has his surname and has older siblings with the same name. They were married and living together when she was born. As he has regular contact with her, pays maintenance and provides he will not agree. He is not prepared to lose parental responsibility as she is his daughter in every way other than DNA. Where does he stand legally?
Boza 6 Feb 2015
I have just found out that my ex wife has changed my kids surname without my consent. She has apparently said she has sole custody however there is not court order to my knowledge and I see me kids through out the year. After reading various articles everything is saying she can't! What's the best way to tackle the change. (I am on the birth certificate for both my kids).
makoti 5 Feb 2015
im marriage to another man and i have achild from the previous marriage can my husband change my child surname to his
SeparatedDads Editor 2 Feb 2015
@ella - As a rule, your ex (given he has parental responsibility) must give his consent to any deepoll name change. However, under special circumstances, or through a court order, a parent can sometimes change their child's name without gaining consent i.e. if you want to change his name to establish a family unit where everybody has the same name. If the father has been absent for some time then this might help your case too. However, you must have taken sufficient steps to contact him before making an application. When you receive your child's Deed Poll document and start sending it of to the relevant organisations, you will need to enclose a letter explaining your situation and why he is no longer a part of your child's life including the fact that he doesn't (if he doesn't) pay maintenance. If you can get his consent it would be a lot easier though. I hope this helps.
ella 30 Jan 2015
I had a child with my ex and his name is on the birth certificate however she has my second name. She doesn't she him as he isn't interested. I'm now engaged and planning to try for a baby later this year. We are planning to marry. Can I legally change my child's name to my husband to be. I don't know where my ex is so how do I go about name change without his permission?
SeparatedDads Editor 22 Jan 2015
@adam - no, as you are still named as the father on the birth certificate your PR rights wont change.
adam 21 Jan 2015
Hi can you tell me if I will lose my parental rights if I agree to change my girls name back to her mother's I want to take my girl on holiday and her mother says the only way I can take her is if I change her name their is no court order for custody
SeparatedDads Editor 7 Jan 2015
@Greeny - it makes sense that she has a name that is relevant to her family. It might be that your ex wants her to take on her new name, but in order to change it she would have to have your written consent. Alternatively, should you want her to have your name you will need your ex's written consent. It sounds like something you are going to have to thrash out between yourselves, or let your daughter decide which name she might like to go under. If she happens to pick your ex's new name, don't be offended, with children it is nothing personal, just the need to fit in. I hope this helps.
Greeny 31 Dec 2014
My Daughter has my ex's surname but is getting married soon and will be taking on her husbands family name. We were never married but have been to court twice and now have contact orders etc. Everything is good now but was wondering is she able to change my childs surname to her new surname? Or if I requested it would I be in a better position to change my childs surname to mine so that she has one of her parents names. Thanks in advance
SeparatedDads Editor 22 Dec 2014
@RosieHelen - yes he still has to pay, as you are still his daughter.
RosieHelen 19 Dec 2014
Hi, I'm 15 on the 10th of Jan, I want to change my last name from my dads name to mums maiden name, pure to the fact that my dad is a tw*t and I hate him, he is supposed to pay maintenance for me and my brother till we're out of education (after college) if I change my name when I'm 16 does he still have to pay for me as I have a different name? Rosie Helen
SeparatedDads Editor 5 Dec 2014
@loulocks - If he has parental responsibility as a general rule, your ex must give his consent to the name change. However, under special circumstances, or through a court order, a parent can sometimes change their child's name without gaining consent i.e. if you want to change his name to establish a family unit where everybody has the same name. If the father has been absent for some time then this might help your case too. However, you must have taken sufficient steps to contact him before making an application. When you receive your child's Deed Poll document and start sending it of to the relevant organisations, you will need to enclose a letter explaining your situation and why he is no longer a part of your child's life including the fact that he doesn't (if he doesn't) pay maintenance. If you can get his consent it would be a lot easier though. I hope this helps.
loulocks 4 Dec 2014
My eldest no longer has contact with his father due to domestic violence issues i have suffered,social servuces have deemed me sole parental rights and i am wondering if i have any.rights to change his name to my last name without his concent or even just add my name to the end of his current name...social sevices have bn involved in the past so how does this work....also my son wants the same name as myself and his younger sibling and is affraid he will be assosiated with his dad whom has a very long and violent criminal record...ur advuce will be very much appriciated..many thany thanks in advance
143 25 Nov 2014
my ex partner has changed our daughter's surname without my permission i am on the birth certificate what can i do about this
Gigi Editor 15 Sep 2014
@Conway23 If the child is 12 years old, he is not old enough to apply for a deed poll himself. Your wife (his mother) can apply for a child deed poll. If they were separated even before the birth of the child maybe he hasn't got PR but it is worth checking on Gov.uk website or with ukdeedpolloffice.org. if he has't got PR the mother can change the name of the child via deed poll. Ta tah!
Conway23 5 Sep 2014
My partners son, from a previous relationship has her surname (from birth), as they seperated before he was even born. Since then we have had 2 children together, both with my surname name. We are getting married next year which means that she and both of MY kids will have my name. But where to do we stand on changing the eldests? I have been his "DAD" since he was 2, he's now 12years old and has called me dad for years. And with him carrying his mother name anyway, can his biological father refuse the changing of his name? Giving that it's not even his name that the child has anyway.
mama 31 Aug 2014
hiii... im a daughter of ullash ch prusty ,he is my actual father bt his surname is Behera not prusty and after devoce of my mother she got another marrage..and her sur name may got change but my surname remain same...what to do please help me....
Tony 29 Aug 2014
Hi, Im 19 years old and I would like to change my surname from my fathers to my mothers. I know that I can legally change my name with out my fathers consent because I am an adult but I am also a full time college student so the State of New York requires my father still pay child support for me and keep me on his health insurance till I am 26. Does anyone know if I change my name does that mean he no longer has to pay child support for me?
Tee 27 Aug 2014
Hi, my son is now 15 years old and has asked to have his surname changed from his dads to mine. His dad and I were never married although he's on the birth certificate, we also didn't live together, his dad had his house and I lived with my son in mine. ?The two don't get along nor have they spoken to each other in about two years. His dad doesnt appear to want anything to do with us. Ive tried to reached out on several occassions with no response. His dad is very confrontational and I'd rather not deal with him if at all possible. Whats required in the state of ohio for me to change his name. Thanks In Advance!
Sunshine 23 Aug 2014
Hi, if a father is on a childs birth certificate, and agrees to a change of surname for the child at the request of the mother, does it affect any rights that the father has once the surname is changed?
MJ 21 Aug 2014
I have good reason to believe that my ex-wife has changed my sons surname without my consent. How can I check this? We have already been to court over this a few years ago and the court order was that his name is NOT to be changed however is it possible for her to do so fraudulently?
kimbo 19 Aug 2014
my husband has custody of his kids, the mother isn't in the picture except periodically when she wants to be, she provides no child support. The child is 14 and wants her last name changed to her dads. her mom had put her last name on the birth certificate. how do we go about getting it changed
sue Editor 12 Aug 2014
@heather, even though you are only adding your name you are still changing the surname as yours will now be on the end. You will still need permission from the father to change the surname via deed poll.
heather 12 Aug 2014
I don't want to change my daughters last name but just add my married name after her last name. Can I just add it since I'm not legally changing her last name just adding mine on?
SeparatedDads Editor 22 Jul 2014
@Kazzy70, was your son born after 1st December 2003? If so then your son's father will have parental responsibility and you will need to obtain his permission before you can change your son's surname. If however your son was born before 1st December 2003 then your son's father does not have parental resonsibility (even though he is on the birth certificate) and you will not need his permission to change the surname.
Kazzy70 21 Jul 2014
Hi, need a bit of advice please, my son is now 11 years old and has asked to have his surname changed from his dads to mine. His dad and I were never married although he's on the birth certificate, we also didn't live together, his dad had his house and I lived with my son in mine. He has just taken us through court because my son refused to see him and he blamed me, he now gets half hour every other week if my son wants to see him. My question is, can I change my sons surname to mine for him as his dad would never agree to it, without having to go to court again?
jennypenny 20 Jun 2014
I am remarried and my ex husband has asked if my new husband wants to put our daughter in my husbands name my ex pays csa would this stop if my daughter changed her name by depot legally to my new husbands name
Mumof2 16 Jun 2014
Hi, I'm wondering if I am able to change my daughters name without consent of her dad as I have been in several cases of domestic abuse and harassment. Social services have been involved in the contact between them and got to the stage where he was being violent to his wife in front of our daughter. I have had help from women's aid and not much could be done as he was only watching me from a distance in their eyes. He told the social he was walking away from all contact with our daughter and have this in writing but I know he won't agree to a name change. Yet he still takes our daughter for family photos at the school without my permission. Is there any advise or put me in contact with anyone that could help please?
Pink36 5 Jun 2014
Hello i am divorced as waiting for court final divorced. My ex husband is from Scotland so I got my own laywer as my ex husband don't have any lawyer cos different law London and Scotland as we married in London and my daughter born London thats why he come from Scotland. My daughter not his real father cos ivf donor sperm someone cos my ex husband can't have kids so I try get my daughter change surname to mine as he not real father!!! My ex husband don't want nothing with my daughter since she born so what I do change her surname I need to know I heard have to wait till 16 right?? Please help me as I am deaf thank you.
andy 29 May 2014
Interestingly enough, july 13th 2013 my beautiful baby girl was born, july 22nd 2013 my so called wife registered our daughters birth behind my back, in her maiden name and middle names all chosen behind my back ( baring in mind we were married and together at the time and still are married but now separated because of the above) I have constantly asked for a name change, General registry office clearly say NO without mothers permission ( and my name isnt on the birth certificate during 11 months of trying to do this...) 27th May 2014 i finally got my name on my daughters birth certificate through many hours days and months of letters, phone calls and trying to patiently wait... My wife committed perjury in a Registry office "under oath" when giving information about the baby, mother and husband; she said she wasn't married, and didn't know the father. So i provided an updated marriage certificate DATED past the birth even though we was married 2 years before the birth/registration, and proof that we was together during the birth, but she still got away with committing perjury and naming my child behind my back in her maiden name? kuniving *****; exactly why i am proceeding divorce from this crooked bi polar witch. Never the less i am now proceeding to General Registry office questioning why they have not prosecuted her for perjury when it clearly states in all their offices and in NATIONAL LEGISLATION that perjury is a crime and person(s) will be prosecuted. So now i sadly have a daughter with a different name than it was supposed to be and access to her has been denied for 11 months due to her not putting my name on the birth certificate......... I married a monster, clearly.
Chinu 28 May 2014
hiii.. i am divorced and planning for remarry. i am having 10 year old son.. i want to know that how could i change the father name in school.
Werra 27 May 2014
If father hawe parent responsibility he can change child surname?its mean he can giwe for child he's surname
shelly 27 May 2014
Hi me and my partner have split up and i want to take his dads name off the birth certificate and change my sons name to mine but i no he will not consent to this can o change it with out going to court his dad dose not see him plus it was due to domestic violence we split up so he cant see him any way a wont go to court he says if his son wants to see him when he is old enough that's up to him
Moly 23 May 2014
Me and my husband have diffrent surnames and we want a 3rd one for our daughter, which will be neither mine nor his, Is this going to lead to Travel complications on a Passport?
Angie 17 Apr 2014
My Question is I have a son with my ex and my son is now 13. My ex never inquired before about changin my sons last name until recently because my son has always had my maiden name because i am married. But recenly inquired on changing the last name to his so he can be a Jr. Im not sure if changing my sons last name will affect him in a negative way, because hes always been known with my last name. Cann anyone give me some positive and negative feed back on changing his last name. His father strongly suggesting that his name be changed. I dont want to make a bad decision. What should i do?
ntombi 3 Nov 2013
I have a child I want to change her into her fathers surname because she is using her granmothers surname I suffured a lot to change mine after my parents separation I dnt want to see her suffer like me
John 25 Jun 2013
My son didn't have my surname, but when her mother got married, I refused to change his urname to her mother's married surname. We agreed on a double surname in court, but it now appears that my son does not carry my part of the surname at school etc. and his mother and the school etc. never told me. Ironically, the surname was changed using my Legal Aid. I cannot stress enough that once a child's surname has been changed, get a copy of the surname change and make sure that the other parent doesn't try to pull the wool over your eyes. Having a known as name in school should be abolished in every school in the world. It is against the law to be known by any other name after a name has been changed. But some parents think they're untouchable. Be warned!
Zoe Davis 14 Feb 2013
Hi I split with my ex a year ago and once he found out I had a nee partner he refused to have accsess to the kids I make him pay csa his names on birth cert but I want to marry and change there names he's known to social services for violence towards me when we was together wil I be ble to do this
Jengar 14 Feb 2013
My twins father was named on the birth certificate but when we split up when they were 5 months old he had no desire to see them so when they were 2 years old I changed their surnames by deed poll to my surname & had no problem changing it with nursery, doctors, working and child tax etc. I was also able to get passports with their new surnames on but I had to send the paper passport application to a passport office recommended by the deed poll office.
Jack 9 Feb 2013
Hi, me and my ex partner separated a year ago, we were never married however lives together and my name is on his birth certificate. I have received a letter from solicitors stating she wishes to combine both our last names into a double barrelled name. (John Doe-Davis for example) can I refuse this as I do not wish our names to be joined
vickie 13 Jan 2013
Hi I was just wondering if I could add my maiden name to my 3 tear old sons birth certificate without his fathers permission my eldest son has a double barelled surname but my youngest only has his fathers name as we were married at the time we are now divorced and I would like my name on his birth certificate
irishstu 30 Nov 2012
Hi, I need help, me and my wife are on the verge of divorce. We have three kids, a cat, a car and a mortgage. I don't get paid a great deal( just enough to get by). Financially it is not possible for us to split. I just need to know if there is financial help out there for me if I move out or for my wife, who wants to continue to live in our house, with a mortgage, on a part time wage. If I move out I need to have a three bedroom house for the kids to stay with me for three and a half days a week. I want to make sure that I have the kids for the same amount of time as my wife.
Madrid 23 Nov 2012
I need to no what to do about changing my daughters last name I was with a ex boy friend when I was pergnet and he is not the dad an I gave my child his last name when she was born and we split and my and her real dad got back together we took a DNA test to prove she was his how do I get my exes last name off and give her ,,her dads last name
dp 18 Sep 2012
I am a dad I am on the birth certificate, I have never married my ex, but I have been in my daughters life since she was born. now she has married and is pregnant. she has stopped me seeing my daughter (iam in the process of going through the courts) and has changed my daughters name on facebook to her new HUSBANDS surname!!! to get at me.I think.how will I know if she has changed it through deed poll?ANY HELP!!!!
dee 21 Jan 2012
hi i have split from my childrens day ten years ago now and he hasnt seen them since can i change there last name as i am marrade and get them a passport or do i have to ask him
valery 28 Oct 2011
hello i was never married to my ex partner , we were only living together for six months after the baby was born , he is on the birth certificate. however i am now pregnant with another child who will carry my name , i want to change my two year old sur name which is my ex s to mine as i want both my children to have the same surname , my child to be is not his child, what chances do i have ?

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